the essays of montaigne, v10-第3章
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broken and half dead； should alone； in a corner of the chimney； enjoy the
money that would suffice for the maintenance and advancement of many
children； and suffer them； in the meantime； to lose their' best years for
want of means to advance themselves in the public service and the
knowledge of men。 A man by this course drives them to despair； and to
seek out by any means； how unjust or dishonourable soever； to provide for
their own support： as I have； in my time； seen several young men of good
extraction so addicted to stealing； that no correction could cure them of
it。 I know one of a very good family； to whom； at the request of a
brother of his； a very honest and brave gentleman； I once spoke on this
account； who made answer； and confessed to me roundly； that he had been
put upon this paltry practice by the severity and avarice of his father；
but that he was now so accustomed to it he could not leave it off。 And；
at that very time； he was trapped stealing a lady's rings； having come
into her chamber； as she was dressing with several others。 He put me in
mind of a story I had heard of another gentleman； so perfect and
accomplished in this fine trade in his youth； that； after he came to his
estate and resolved to give it over； he could not hold his hands；
nevertheless； if he passed by a shop where he saw anything he liked； from
catching it up； though it put him to the shame of sending afterwards to
pay for it。 And I have myself seen several so habituated to this quality
that even amongst their comrades they could not forbear filching； though
with intent to restore what they had taken。 I am a Gascon； and yet there
is no vice I so little understand as that； I hate it something more by
disposition than I condemn it by reason； I do not so much as desire
anything of another man's。 This province of ours is； in plain truth； a
little more decried than the other parts of the kingdom； and yet we have
several times seen； in our times； men of good families of other
provinces； in the hands of justice； convicted of abominable thefts。 I
fear this vice is； in some sort； to be attributed to the fore…mentioned
vice of the fathers。
And if a man should tell me； as a lord of very good understanding once
did； that 〃he hoarded up wealth； not to extract any other fruit and use
from his parsimony； but to make himself honoured and sought after by his
relations； and that age having deprived him of all other power； it was
the only remaining remedy to maintain his authority in his family； and to
keep him from being neglected and despised by all around；〃 in truth； not
only old age； but all other imbecility； according to Aristotle； is the
promoter of avarice； that is something； but it is physic for a disease
that a man should prevent the birth of。 A father is very miserable who
has no other hold on his children's affection than the need they have of
his assistance； if that can be called affection； he must render himself
worthy to be respected by his virtue and wisdom； and beloved by his
kindness and the sweetness of his manners； even the very ashes of a rich
matter have their value； and we are wont to have the bones and relics of
worthy men in regard and reverence。 No old age can be so decrepid in a
man who has passed his life in honour； but it must be venerable；
especially to his children； whose soul he must have trained up to their
duty by reason； not by necessity and the need they have of him； nor by
harshness and compulsion：
〃Et errat longe mea quidem sententia
Qui imperium credat esse gravius； aut stabilius；
Vi quod fit； quam illud； quod amicitia adjungitur。〃
＇〃He wanders far from the truth； in my opinion； who thinks that
government more absolute and durable which is acquired by force than
that which is attached to friendship。Terence； Adelph。； i。 I； 40。＇
I condemn all violence in the education of a tender soul that is designed
for honour and liberty。 There is I know not what of servile in rigour
and constraint； and I am of opinion that what is not to be done by
reason； prudence； and address； is never to be affected by force。 I
myself was brought up after that manner； and they tell me that in all my
first age I never felt the rod but twice； and then very slightly。 I
practised the same method with my children； who all of them died at
nurse； except Leonora； my only daughter； and who arrived to the age of
five years and upward without other correction for her childish faults
（her mother's indulgence easily concurring） than words only； and those
very gentle； in which kind of proceeding； though my end and expectation
should be both frustrated； there are other causes enough to lay the fault
on without blaming my discipline； which I know to be natural and just；
and I should； in this； have yet been more religious towards the males； as
less born to subjection and more free； and I should have made it my
business to fill their hearts with ingenuousness and freedom。 I have
never observed other effects of whipping than to render boys more
cowardly； or more wilfully obstinate。
Do we desire to be beloved of our children？ Will we remove from them all
occasion of wishing our death though no occasion of so horrid a wish can
either be just or excusable？
〃Nullum scelus rationem habet。〃
＇〃No wickedness has reason。〃Livy； xxviii。 28＇
Let us reasonably accommodate their lives with what is in our power。 In
order to this； we should not marry so young that our age shall in a
manner be confounded with theirs； for this inconvenience plunges us into
many very great difficulties； and especially the gentry of the nation；
who are of a condition wherein they have little to do； and who live upon
their rents only： for elsewhere； with people who live by their labour；
the plurality and company of children is an increase to the common stock；
they are so many new tools and instruments wherewith to grow rich。
I married at three…and…thirty years of age； and concur in the opinion of
thirty…five； which is said to be that of Aristotle。 Plato will have
nobody marry before thirty； but he has reason to laugh at those who
undertook the work of marriage after five…and…fifty； and condemns their
offspring as unworthy of aliment and life。 Thales gave the truest
limits； who； young and being importuned by his mother to marry； answered；
〃That it was too soon；〃 and； being grown into years and urged again；
〃That it was too late。〃 A man must deny opportunity to every inopportune
action。 The ancient Gauls' looked upon it as a very horrid thing for a
man to have society with a woman before he was twenty years of age； and
strictly recommended to the men who designed themselves for war the
keeping their virginity till well grown in years； forasmuch as courage is
abated and diverted by intercourse with women：
〃Ma； or congiunto a giovinetta sposa；
E lieto omai de' figli； era invilito
Negli affetti di padre et di marito。〃
＇〃Now； married to a young wife and happy in children； he was
demoralised by his love as father and husband。〃
Tasso； Gierus。； x。 39。＇
Muley Hassam； king of Tunis； he whom the Emperor Charles V。 restored to
his kingdom； reproached the memory of his father Mahomet with the
frequentation of women； styling him loose； effeminate； and a getter of
children。＇Of whom he had thirty…four。＇ The Greek history observes of
Iccus the Tarentine； of Chryso； Astyllus； Diopompos； and others； that to
keep their bodies in order for the Olympic games and such like exercises；
they denied themselves during that preparation all commerce with Venus。
In a certain country of the Spanish Indies men were not permitted to
marry till after forty age； and yet the girls were allowed at ten。
'Tis not time for a gentleman of thirty years old to give place to his
son who is twenty； he is himself in a condition to serve both in the
expeditions of war and in the court of his prince； has need of all his
appurtenances； and yet； doubtless； he ought to surrender a share； but not
so great an one as to forget himself for others； and for such an one the
ans
