time enough for love-时间足够你爱(英文版)-第79章

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　　〃'Uncle　Gibbie'　is　gone；　and　so　is　'Little　Dora。'　I'm　almost　as　tall　as　you　are　now；　and　I've　known　for　two　years　who　you　are；　and　I　had　guessed　it　before　that…guessed　that　you　were　one　of　the　Methuselahs；　I　mean。　But　I　said　nothing　to　anyone。　And　never　will。〃
　　
　　〃Don't　make　it　a　promise；　Dora；　it　isn't　necessary。　It's　just　that　I　never　meant　to　burden　you　with　it。　How　did　I　give　myself　away？　I　thought　I　had　been　most　careful。〃
　　
　　〃You　have　been。　But　I　have　seen　you　nearly　every　day　almost　as　far　back　as　I　can　remember。　Little　things。　Things　no　one　would　notice　who　didn't　see　you…really　look　at　you　every　day。〃
　　
　　〃Well；　yes。　But　I？didn't　expect　to　have　to　keep　it　up　so　long。　Helen　knew？〃
　　
　　〃I　think　she　did。　We　never　spoke　of　it。　But　I　think　she　guessed　the　same　way　I　did　and　she　may　have　figured　out　which　Methuselah　you　are…〃
　　
　　〃Don't　call　me　that；　dear。　It's　like　calling　a　Jew　a　'kike。'　I'm　a　member　of　the　Howard　Families。　A　Howard。〃
　　
　　〃I'm　sorry。　I　didn't　know　that　the　name　mattered。〃
　　
　　〃Well　。　。　it　doesn't；　really。　It's　just　a　word　that　reminds　me　of　a　time　long　gone。　A　time　of　persecution。　Sorry；　Dora；　you　were　telling　me　how　you　learned　that　my　name　is　'Lazarus。'　One　of　my　names；　that　is；　for　I　am　'Ernest　Gibbons'　just　as　truly。〃
　　
　　〃Yes　。　。　Uncle　Gibbie。　It　was　in　a　book；　a　picture。　A　microbook　one　has　to　read　with　the　viewer　at　the　town　library。　I　saw　this　picture　and　winked　on　past　it…then　clicked　back　and　looked　again。　You　weren't　wearing　whiskers　in　the　picture　and　your　hair　was　longer　。　。　but　the　longer　I　stared　at　it；　the　more　it　looked　like　my　foster　uncle。　But　1　couldn't　be　sure…and　couldn't　ask。〃
　　
　　'Why　not；　Dora？　I　would　have　told　you　the　truth。〃
　　
　　〃If　you　had　wanted　me　to　know；　you　would　have　told　me。　You　always　have　reasons　for　everything　you　do；　everything　you　say。　I　learned　that　when　I　was　so　little　we　used　to　ride　the　same　saddle。　So　I　didn't　say　anything。　Until…　Well；　until　today。　Knowing　that　you　are　leaving。〃
　　
　　〃Have　I　said　that　I　was　leaving？〃
　　
　　〃Please！　~Once；　when　I　was　very　little；　you　told　me　a　story　about　when　you　were　a　little　boy　hearing　wild　geese　honking　in　the　sky…how；　when　you　grew　up；　you　wanted　to　find　out　where　they　went。　I　didn't　know　what　a　wild　goose　was；　you　had　to　explain　to　me。　I　know　you　follow　the　wild　goose。　When　you　hear　them　honking；　you　have　to　go。　You've　been　hearing　them　in　your　head　for　three　or　four　years。　I　know　。　。　because　when　you　hear　them；　I　hear　them；　too。　And　now　the　ship　is　here　and　it's　very　loud　in　your　head。　So　I　knew。〃
　　
　　〃Dora；　Dora！〃
　　
　　〃Don't；　please。　I'm　not　trying　to　hold　you　back；　truly　I'm　not。　But　before　you　go；　I　want　something　very　much。〃
　　
　　〃What；　Dora？　Uh；　didn't　mean　to　tell　you　this　yet；　but　I'm　leaving　some　property　for　you　with　John　Magee。　Should　be　enough　for…〃
　　
　　〃No；　no；　please！　I'm　a　grown　woman　now；　and　self…supporting。　What　I　want　doesn't　cost　anything。〃　She　looked　him　steadily　in　the　eye。　〃I　want　your　child；　Lazarus。〃
　　
　　Lazarus　Long　took　a　deep　breath；　tried　to　steady　his　heartbeat。　〃Dora；　Dora；　my　dear；　you　are　hardly　more　than　a　child　yourself；　it　is　too　soon　for　you　to　be　talking　about　having　one。　You　don't　want　to　marry　me…〃
　　
　　〃I　did　not　ask　you　to　marry　me。〃
　　
　　〃I　was　trying　to　say　that；　in　a　year　or　two…or　three；　or　four
　　
　　…you　will　want　to　marry。　Then　you　will　be　glad　that　you　did　not　have　my　child。〃
　　
　　〃You　refuse　me　this？〃
　　
　　〃I'm　saying　that　you　must　not　let　an　emotional　upset　over　parting　cause　you　to　make　any　such　hasty　decision。〃
　　
　　She　sat　very　straight　in　the　saddle；　squared　her　shoulders。　〃It　is　not　a　hasty　decision；　sir。　I　made　up　my　mind　long　ago
　　
　　even　before　I　guessed　that　you　were　a…Howard。　Long　before。　I　told　Aunt　Helen；　and　she　said　that　I　was　a　silly　girl　and　that　I　must　forget　it。　But　I　have　never　forgotten　it；　and　if　I　was　a　silly　girl　then；　I　am　much　older　now　and　know　what　I　am　doing。　Lazarus；　I　am　not　asking　for　anything　else。　It　could　be　syringes　and　such；　with　Doc　Krausmeyer's　help。　Or〃
　　
　　…again　she　looked　him　squarely　in　his　eyes…〃it　could　be　the　usual　way。〃　She　dropped　her　eyes；　then　looked　up　again；　smiled　briefly　and　added；　〃But；　either　way；　it　had　best　be　quickly。　I　don't　know　the　ship's　schedule；　I　do　know　mine。〃
　　
　　Gibbons　spent　all　of　a　half　second　reviewing　certain　factors　in　his　mind。　〃Dora。〃
　　
　　〃Yes　。　。　Err（est？〃
　　
　　〃My　name　is　not　'Ernest；'　nor　is　it　'Lazarus。'　My　right　name　is　Woodrow　Wilson　Smith。　So　since　I　am　no　longer　'Uncle　Gibbie'…and　you　are　right　on　that　point；　'Uncle　Gibbie'　is　gone　and　will　never　be　back…you　might　as　well　call　me　'Woodrow。'〃
　　
　　〃Yes；　Woodrow。〃
　　
　　〃Do　you　want　to　know　why　I　had　to　change　my　name？〃
　　
　　〃No；　Woodrow。〃
　　
　　〃So？　Do　you　want　to　know　how　old　I　am？'
　　
　　〃No；　Woodrow。〃
　　
　　〃But　you　want　to　have　a　chil？　by　me？〃
　　
　　〃Yes；　Woodrow。〃
　　
　　〃Will　you　marry　me？〃
　　
　　Her　eyes　widened　slightly。　But　she　answered　at　once：
　　
　　〃No；　Woodrow。〃
　　
　　Minerva；　at　that　point　Dora　and　I　almost　had　our　first…　and　last；　and　only…quarrel。　She　had　been　a　sweet　and　lovable　baby　who　had　grown　into　a　sweet…tempered　and　utterly　lovable　young　woman。　But　she　was　as　stubborn　as　I　am…with　the　sort　of　firmness　that　can't　be　argued　with；　because　she　would　not　argue。　I　pay　her　the　respect　of　believing　that　she　had　thought　this　through；　all　aspects；　and　had　long　since　made　up　her　mind　to　bear　my　child　if　I　would　let　her…bi~t　not　to　marry　me。
　　
　　As　for　me；　I　did　not　ask　。her　to　marry　me　on　impulse；　it　just　sounds　like　it。　A　supersaturated　solution　will　crystallize　almost　instantly；　that's　the　shape　I　was　in。　I　had　lost　interest　in　that　colony　years　earlier；　as　soon　as　it　stopped　presenting　real　challenges；　I　was　itching　to　do　something　else。　At　the　top　of　my　mind　I　thought　I　was　waiting　for　Zack　to　return　。　。　but　when　the　Andy　J。　finally　did　orbit　in　that　sky；　two　years　overdue…well；　I　learned　that　it　was　not　what　I　had　been　waiting　for。
　　
　　When　Dora　made　that　amazing　request；　I　knew　what　I　had　been　waiting　for。
　　
　　Surely；　I　tried　to　argue　her　out　of　it…but　I　was　playing　devil's　advocate。　In　fact；　my　mind　was　busy　with　what　and　how。　All　the　objections　to　marrying　a　short…lifer　still　remained。　My　even　stronger　objections　to　leaving　a　pregnant　woman　behind　me…shucks；　dear；　I　didn't　spend　a　nanosecond　on　that。
　　
　　〃Why　not；　Dora？〃
　　
　　〃I　told　you。　You　are　leaving；　I　will　not　hold　you　back。〃
　　
　　〃You　won't　hold　me　back。　No　one　ever　has　yet；　Dora。　But
　　
　　…no　marriage；　no　child。〃
　　
　　第37节
　　
　　She　looked　thoughtful。　〃What　is　your　purpose　in　insisting　on　a　marriage　ceremony；　Woodrow？　So　that　our　child　will　bear　your　name？　I　don't　want　to　be　a　sky　widow　。　。　but　if　that　is　what　it　takes；　let's　ride　back　to　town　and　find　the　Moderator。　Because　it　really　should　be　today。　If　the　books　are　right　about　how　to　figure　it。〃
　　
　　〃Woman4　you　talk　too　much。〃　She　did　not　answer　this；　he　went　on：　〃I　don't　give　a　hoot　about　a　wedding　ceremony…　certainly　not　one　in　Top　Dollar。〃
　　
　　She　hesitated；　then　said；　〃May　I　say　that　I　do　not　understand？〃
　　
　　〃Eh？　Yes；　surely。　Dora；　I　won't　settle　for　one　child。　You're　going　to　have　half　a　dozen　children　by　me；　or　more。　Probably　more。　Maybe　a　dozen。　Any　objection？〃
　　
　　〃Yes；　Woodrow…I　mean　No；　I　do　not　object。　Yes；　I　will　have　a　dozen　children　by　you。　Or　more。〃
　　
　　〃Having　a　dozen　kids　takes　time；　Dora。　How　often　should　I　show　up？　Every　two　years；　maybe？〃
　　
　　〃Whatever　you　say；　Woodrow。　Whenever　you　e　back…　each　time　you　e　back…I'll　have　a　child　by　you。　But　I　do　ask　that　we　start　the　first　one　at　once。〃
　　
　　〃You　crazy　little　idiot；　I　believe　you　would　do　it　that　way。〃
　　
　　〃Not　'would'…shall。　If　you　will。〃
　　
　　〃Well；　we're　not　going　to　do　it　that　way。〃　He　reached　out　and　took　her　hand。　〃Doja；　will　you　go　where　I　go；　do　what　I　do；　live　where　I　live？〃
　　
　　She　looked　startled　but　answered　steadily；　〃Yes；　Woodrow。　If　this　is　truly　what　you