anner.vittoriothevampire-第40章

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n　the　empty　air　or　her　eyes　opening。　I　couldn't　bear　it。
　The　points　of　her　slippers　were　small　beneath　her　hem。　How　daintily　she　must　have　lain　down　to　her　rest　at　sunrise。　Who　had　pulled　closed　the　trapdoor；　whose　chains　had　fallen？　Who　had　set　the　trap　of　the　spears；　whose　engines　I　had　never　inspected　or　passed　with　my　thoughts？
　For　the　first　time　in　the　dimness；　I　saw　a　tiny　golden　circlet　on　her　head；　lying　just　around　the　crown　and　fixed　by　the　tiniest　pins　into　the　waves　so　that　its　single　pearl　rested　on　her　forehead。　Such　a　small　thing。
　Was　her　soul　so　small？　Would　Hell　take　it；　like　the　fire　would　take　any　tender　part　of　her　anatomy；　like　the　sun　would　burn　to　horror　her　immaculate　face？
　In　some　mother's　womb　she　had　once　slept　and　dreamt；　and　into　some　father's　arms　been　placed。
　What　had　been　her　tragedy　to　bring　her　to　this　foul　and　reeking　grave；　where　the　heads　of　her　slain　panions　lay　burning　slowly　in　the　sun's　ever　patient；　ever　indifferent　light？
　I　turned　on　them。　I　held　my　sword　down　at　my　side。　〃One；　let　one　only　live。　One！〃　I　declared。
　Ramiel　covered　his　face　and　turned　his　back　on　me。　Setheus　continued　to　stare　but　shook　his　head。　My　guardians　only　gazed　at　me　with　their　level　coldness；　as　they　always　had。　Mastema　stared　at　me；　soundlessly；　concealing　whatever　thought　he　possessed　behind　his　serene　mask　of　a　face。
　〃No；　Vittorio；〃　he　said。　〃Do　you　think　a　bevy　of　God's　angels　has　helped　you　past　these　barriers　to　leave　one　such　as　these　to　live？〃
　〃Mastema；　she　loved　me。　And　I　love　her。　Mastema；　she　gave　me　my　life。　Mastema；　I　ask　in　the　name　of　love。　I　beg　in　the　name　of　love。　All　else　here　has　been　justice。　But　what　can　I　say　to　God　if　I　slay　this　one；　who　has　loved　and　whom　I　love？〃
　Nothing　in　his　countenance　changed。　He　only　regarded　me　with　his　eternal　calm。　I　heard　a　terrible　sound。　It　was　the　weeping　of　Ramiel　and　Setheus。　My　guardians　turned　to　look　at　them；　as　though　surprised；　but　only　mildly　so；　and　then　their　dreamy　soft　eyes　fixed　again；　unchanging；　on　me。
　〃Merciless　angels；〃　I　said。　〃Oh；　but　such　is　not　fair；　and　I　know　it。　I　lie。　I　lie。　Forgive　me。〃
　〃We　forgive　you；〃　said　Mastema。　〃But　you　must　do　what　you　have　promised　me　you　would　do。〃
　〃Mastema；　can　she　be　saved？　If　she　herself　renounces。。。　can　she。。。　is　her　soul　still　human？〃　No　answer　came　from　him。　No　answer。
　〃Mastema；　please；　tell　me。　Don't　you　see？　If　she　can　be　saved；　I　can　stay　here　with　her；　I　can　wring　it　out　of　her；　I　know　I　can　because　her　heart　is　good。　It's　young　and　good。　Mastema；　tell　me。　Can　such　a　creature　as　she　is　be　saved？〃
　No　answer。　Ramiel　had　lain　his　head　against　Setheus's　shoulder。
　〃Oh；　please；　Setheus；〃　I　said。　〃Tell　me。　Can　she　be　saved？　Must　she　die　by　my　hand？　What　if　I　stay　here　with　her；　and　wring　it　out　of　her；　her　confession；　her　final　disavowal　of　all　that　she　has　ever　done？　Is　there　no　priest　who　can　give　her　absolution？　Oh；　God。。。〃
　〃Vittorio；〃　came　the　whisper　from　Ramiel。　〃Are　your　ears　stopped　with　wax？　Can　you　hear　those　prisoners　starving；　crying？　You　have　not　even　set　them　free　yet。　Will　you　do　it　by　night？〃
　〃I　can　do　it。　I　can　yet　do　it。　But　can　I　not　stay　here　with　her；　and　when　she　finds　she　is　all　alone；　that　all　the　others　have　perished；　that　all　the　promises　of　Godric　and　Florian　were　tyranny；　is　there　no　way　that　she　can　render　her　soul　to　God？〃
　Mastema；　without　ever　a　change　in　his　soft　cold　eyes；　slowly　turned　his　back。
　〃No！　Don't　do　it；　don't　turn　away！〃　I　shouted。　I　caught　hold　of　his　powerful　silk…clad　arm。　I　felt　his　unsurmountable　strength　beneath　the　fabric；　the　strange；　unnatural　fabric。　He　gazed　down　at　me。　〃Why　can't　you　tell　me！〃
　〃For　the　love　of　God；　Vittorio！〃　he　roared　suddenly；　his　voice　filling　the　entire　crypt。　〃Don't　you　realize？　We　don't　know！〃
　He　shook　me　loose；　the　better　to　glare　down　at　me；　his　brows　furrowed；　his　hand　closing　on　the　hilt　of　his　sword。
　〃We　don't　e　from　a　species　that　has　ever　known　forgiveness！〃　he　shouted。　〃We　are　not　flesh　and　blood；　and　in　our　realm　things　are　Light　or　they　are　the　Darkness；　and　that　is　all　we　know！〃
　In　a　fury；　he　turned　and　marched　towards　her。　I　rushed　after　him；　pulling　at　him；　but　unable　to　deter　him　a　fraction　from　his　purpose。
　He　plunged　his　hand　down；　past　her　groping　hands；　and　clutched　her　tiny　neck。　Her　eyes　stared　up　at　him　in　that　terrible；　terrible　blindness。
　〃She　has　a　human　soul　in　her；〃　he　said　in　a　whisper。　And　then　he　drew　back　as　if　he　did　not　want　to　touch　her；　couldn't　bear　to　touch　her；　and　he　backed　away　from　her；　shoving　me　away；　forcing　me　back　as　he　did。
　I　broke　into　weeping。　The　sun　shifted；　and　the　shadows　began　to　thicken　in　the　crypt。　I　turned　finally。　The　patch　of　light　above　was　now　pale。　It　was　a　rich　radiant　gold；　but　it　was　pale。
　My　angels　stood　there；　all　gathered；　watching　me　and　waiting。
　〃I'm　staying　with　her　here；〃　I　said。　〃She'll　wake　soon。　And　I'll　put　it　to　her；　that　she　pray　for　God's　grace。〃
　I　knew　it　only　as　I　said　it。　I　understood　it　only　as　I　made　it　plain。
　〃I'll　stay　with　her。　If　she　renounces　all　her　sins　for　the　love　of　God；　then　she　can　remain　with　me；　and　death　will　e；　and　we　will　not　lift　a　hand　to　hasten　it；　and　God　will　accept　us　both。〃
　〃You　think　you　have　the　strength　to　do　that？〃　Mastema　asked。　〃And　you　think　it　of　her？〃
　〃I　owe　her　this；〃　I　said。　〃I　am　bound。　I　never　lied　to　you；　not　to　any　of　you。　I　never　lied　to　myself。　She　slew　my　brother　and　sister。　I　saw　her。　No　doubt　she　killed　many　of　them；　my　own。　But　she　saved　me。　She　saved　me　twice。　And　to　kill　is　simple；　but　to　save　is　not！〃
　〃Ah；〃　said　Mastema　as　though　I'd　struck　him。　〃That's　true。〃
　〃So　I'll　stay。　I　expect　nothing　from　you　now。　I　know　I　cannot　get　out　of　here。　Perhaps　even　she　cannot。〃
　〃Of　course　she　can；〃　said　Mastema。
　〃Don't　leave　him；〃　said　Setheus。　〃Take　him　against　his　will。〃
　〃None　of　us　can　do　that；　and　you　know　it；〃　said　Mastema。
　〃Only　out　of　the　crypt；〃　pleaded　Ramiel；　〃as　if　from　a　canyon　into　which　he's　fallen。〃
　〃But　it　is　not　such　a　thing；　and　I　cannot。〃
　〃Then　let　us　stay　with　him；〃　said　Ramiel。
　〃Yes；　let　us　stay；〃　said　my　two　guardians；　more　or　less　at　the　same　time　and　in　similar　muted　expressions。　〃Let　her　see　us。〃
　〃How　do　we　know　that　she　can？〃　asked　Mastema。　〃How　do　we　know　that　she　will？　How　many　times　does　it　happen　that　a　human　being　can　see　us？〃
　For　the　first　time　I　saw　anger　in　him。　He　looked　at　me。
　〃God　has　played　such　a　game　with　you；　Vittorio！〃　he　said。　〃Given　you　such　enemies　and　such　allies！〃
　〃Yes；　I　know　this；　and　I　will　beg　Him　with　all　my　strength　and　the　weight　of　all　my　suffering　for　her　soul。〃　I　didn't　mean　to　close　my　eyes。　I　know　that　I　did　not。
　But　the　entire　scene　was　altered　utterly。　The　pile　of　heads　lay　as　before；　and　some　at　random；　shriveling；　drying　up；　the　acrid　smoke　still　rising　from　them；　and　the　light　above　had　darkened；　yet　it　was　still　golden；　golden　beyond　the　broken　stair；　and　the　jagged　broken　spears；　golden　with　the　last　burnt　dregs　of　the　late　afternoon。　And　my　angels　had　gone。
　
　
　12
　DELIVER　ME　NOT　INTO　TEMPTATION
　
　FOR　all　my　youth；　my　body　could　take　no　more。　Yet　how　could　I　remain　in　this　crypt；　waiting　for　her　to　awake；　I　without　attempting　some　form　of　exit？
　I　gave　no　thought　to　the　dismissal　by　my　angels。　I　deserved　it；　but　I　was　convinced　of　the　rectitude　of　the　chance　I　meant　to　give　her；　that　she　throw　herself　on　the　mercy　of　God；　and　that　we　leave　this　crypt　and；　if　necessary；　find　the　priest　who　could　absolve　her　human　soul　of　all　her　sins。　For　if　she　could　not　make　a　perfect　confession　for　the　love　of　God　alone；　well；　then；　the　absolution　would　surely　save　her。
　I　poked　around　the　crypt；　stepping　among　the　drying…up　corpses。　What　light　there　was　gleamed　on　dried　founts　of　blood　that　ran　down　the　sides　of　the　stone　biers。
　At　last　I　found　what　I　had　hoped　to　find；　a　great　ladder　that　could　be　lifted　and　thrown　up　to　the　ceiling　above。　Only；　how　could　I　wield　such　a　thing？
　I　dragged　it　towards　the　center　of　the　crypt；　kicking　out　of　my　path　the　heads　which　were　now　damaged　beyond　reprieve；　and　I　laid　down　the　ladder；　and　stepped　at　midpoint；　between　two　of　the　rungs；　and　tried　from　there　to　lift　i