anner.vittoriothevampire-第18章
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One man said to buy the damned tray； while the other said the infant wouldn't even live and the gift was premature； and a third man said the woman would wele the beautiful gorgeously painted birthing tray anyway。
They stopped when I entered the shop proper to look at all the imported wares； but then when I turned my back； one of the men uttered under his breath； 〃If she has a brain in her head； she'll do it。〃 I was struck by the words； so struck that I turned at once to snatch a handsome plate from the shelf and pretend to be much impressed with it。 〃So lovely；〃 I said； as if I hadn't heard them。
The merchant got up and started to extoll the contents on display。 The others melted into the gathering evening outside。 I stared at the man。
〃Is the child sick？〃 I asked in the smallest most childish voice that I myself could muster。
〃Oh； no； well； I don't think so； but you know how it is；〃 said the man。 〃The child's smallish。〃
〃Weak；〃 I volunteered。
In a very clumsy way； he said； 〃Yes； weak。〃 His smile was artificial； but he thought himself quite successful。
Then both of us turned to fussing over the wares。 I bought a tiny porcelain cup； very beautifully painted； which he claimed to have bought from a Venetian。
I knew damned good and well I should leave without a word； but I couldn't stop myself from asking him as I paid； 〃Do you think the poor smallish weak child will live？〃
He laughed a rather deep coarse laugh as he took my money。 〃No；〃 he said； and then he glanced at me as though he'd been in his thoughts。 〃Don't worry about it； Signore；〃 he said with a little smile。 〃Have you e to live here？〃
〃No； Sir； only passing through； going north；〃 I said。
〃North？〃 he asked； a little startled but sarcastic。 He shut up the cashbox and turned the key。 Then shaking his head as he put the box into the cabinet and closed the doors； he said； 〃North； eh？ Well； good luck to you； my boy。〃 He gave a sour chuckle。 〃That's an ancient road。 You better ride as fast as you can from sunup。〃
〃Thank you； Sir；〃 I said。 Night was ing on。
I hurried into an alleyway and stood there； against the wall； catching my breath as though someone were chasing me。 I let the little cup fall and it shattered loudly； the noise echoing up the towering buildings。 I was half out of my wits。
But instantly and fully aware of my situation； and convinced of the horrors I had discovered； I made an inflexible decision。
I wasn't safe in the Inn； so what did this matter？ I was going to do it my way and see for myself。 This is what I did。
Without going back to the Inn； without ever officially leaving my room in the Inn； I turned uphill when the shadows were thick enough to cover me； and I climbed the narrowing street towards the old ruined castle。
Now all day I had been looking at this imposing collection of rock and decay； and could see that it was indeed utterly ruined and empty of all save the birds of the air； except； as I have said； for the lower floors； which supposedly held offices。
But the castle had two standing towers remaining to it； one that faced over the town； and another； much fallen away； beyond and remote on the edge of a cliff； as I had seen from the lower farmland。
Well； I made for the tower that overlooked the town。
The government offices were shut up of course already； and the curfew soldiers would soon be out； and there was noise from only a couple of taverns that obviously stayed open no matter what the law was。
The piazza before the castle was empty； and because the three streets of the town took many a curve in their way downhill； I could see almost nothing now but a few dim torches。
The sky； however； was wondrously bright； clear of all but the most rounded and discreetly shaped clouds； very visible against the deeper blue of the night； and the stars seemed exquisitely numerous。
I found old winding stairs； too narrow almost for a human being； that curved around the useful part of the old citadel and led up to the first platform of stone； before an entrance to the tower。
Of course this architecture was no stranger to me whatsoever。 The stones were of a rougher texture than those of my old home； and somewhat darker； but the tower was broad and square and timelessly solid。
I knew that the place was ancient enough that I would find stone stairways leading quite high； and I did； and soon came to the end of my trek in a high room which gave me a view of the entire town stretched out before me。
There were higher chambers； but they had been accessible in centuries past by wooden ladders that could be pulled up； to defeat an enemy and isolate him below； and I couldn't get to them。 I could hear the birds up there； disturbed by my presence。 And I could hear the breeze moving faintly。 However； this was fine； this height。
I had a view all around from the four narrow windows of this place； looking in all directions。
And most especially； and important to me； I could see the town itself； directly below me； shaped like a great eye … an oval with tapered ends … with random torches burning here and there； and an occasional dimly lighted window； and I could see a lantern moving slowly as someone walked in a leisurely pace down one of the thoroughfares。
No sooner had I seen this moving lantern than it went out。 It seemed the streets were utterly deserted。
Then the windows too went dark； and very shortly there were not four torches that I could see anywhere。
This darkness had a calming effect on me。 The open country sank into a deep dark tinge of blue beneath the pearly heavens； and I could see the forests encroaching on the tilled land； creeping higher here and there； as the hills folded over one another or sank steeply into valleys of pure blackness。 I could hear the total emptiness of the tower。
Nothing stirred now； not even the birds。 I was quite alone。 I could have heard the slightest footfall on the stairs down below。 No one knew I was here。 All slept。 I was safe here。 And I could keep a vigil。
I was too full of misery to be frightened； and frankly I was prepared to take my stand against Ursula in this spot； preferred it； in fact； to the confines of the Inn； and I feared nothing as I said my prayers and laid my hand on my sword as usual。
What did I expect to see in this sleeping town？ Anything that happened in it。
Now； what did I think that was to be？ I couldn't have told anyone。 But as I circled the room； as I glanced again and again down at the few scattered lights below and the hulk of the descending ramparts beneath the glowing summer sky； the place seemed loathsome； full of deceit； full of witchcraft； full of payment to the Devil。
〃You think I don't know where your unwanted babies are taken？〃 I muttered in a rage。 〃You think that people who are down with the plague are weled right through the open gates of your neighboring cities？〃
I was startled by the echoes of my own murmurings off the cold walls。
〃But what do you do with them； Ursula？ What would you have done with my brother and sister？〃
My ruminations were madness perhaps； or might have seemed so to some。 But I learnt this。 Revenge takes one's mind from the pain。 Revenge is a lure； a mighty molten lure； even if it is hopeless。
One blow from this sword and I can strike off her head； I thought； and heave it out that window； and then what will she be but a demon stripped of all worldly power？ Now and then I half…drew my sword； then put it back。 I took out my longest dagger and slapped the palm of my left hand with its blade。 I never stopped walking。
Suddenly； as I made one of my boring circumlocutions； I happened to spy far away； on a distant mountain； in which direction I really didn't know … but not the direction by which I had e … a great quantity of light playing behind the mesh of the sylvan darkness。
At first I thought this might be a fire； there was so much light； but as I narrowed my eyes and focused my mind； I saw that this was out of the question。
There was no riotous glare on the few visible clouds above； and the illumination； for all the breadth of it； was contained as if it emanated from a vast congregation gathered together with a fantastical quantity of candles。 How steady yet pulsing
