jg.skippingchristmas-第6章

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　〃Sounds　wonderful；〃　Candi　said。
　〃Then　what　do　we　do　Christmas　Eve？〃　Merry　asked。
　〃You'll　think　of　something；〃　Nora　replied。　〃There　are　other　parties。〃
　〃But　none　like　yours。〃
　〃You're　sweet。〃
　〃When　do　you　leave？〃　Candi　asked；　dreaming　now　of　beaches　and　no　in…laws　piled　in　for　a　week。
　〃Christmas　Day。　Around　noon。〃　It　was　an　odd　time　to　leave；　she　had　thought　after　Luther　had　booked　the　cruise。　If　we're　not　celebrating　Christmas；　dear；　she'd　said；　why　not　leave　a　few　days　earlier？　Avoid　Christmas　Eve　while　we're　at　it。　Eliminate　the　whole　crazy　mess。　〃What　if　Blair　calls　Christmas　Eve？〃　he'd　replied。　And　besides；　Biff　got　399　knocked　off　the　package　because　few　people　travel　on　the　twenty…fifth。　Anyway；　it　was　booked　and　paid　for　and　nothing　was　going　to　change。
　〃Then　why　not　have　the　party　on　Christmas　Eve　anyway？〃　Merry　asked；　getting　pushy；　fearful　that　she　might　feel　obligated　to　host　a　replacement。
　〃Because　we　don't　want　to；　Merry。　We're　taking　a　break；　okay。　A　year　off。　No　Christmas　whatsoever。　Nothing。　No　tree；　no　turkey；　no　gifts。　We're　taking　the　money　and　splurging　on　a　cruise。　Get　it？〃
　〃I　get　it；　Candi　said。　〃I　wish　Norman　would　do　something　like　that。　He　wouldn't　dream　of　it；　though；　afraid　he'd　miss　twenty　or　so　bowl　games。　I'm　so　envious；　Nora。〃
　And　with　that　Merry　took　a　bite　of　her　avocado　sandwich。　She　chewed　and　began　glancing　around　the　deli。　Nora　knew　exactly　what　she　was　thinking。　Who　can　I　tell　first？　The　Kranks　are　slapping　Christmas！　No　party！　No　tree！　Nothing　but　money　in　their　pockets　so　they　can　blow　it　on　a　cruise。
　Nora　ate　too；　knowing　that　as　soon　as　she　stepped　through　the　door　over　there　the　gossip　would　roar　through　the　deli　and　before　dinner　everyone　in　her　world　would　know　the　news。　So　what？　she　told　herself。　It　was　inevitable；　and　why　was　it　such　a　big　deal？　Half　would　be　in　Candi's　camp；　burning　with　envy　and　dreaming　along　with　Nora。　Half　would　be　with　Merry；　seemingly　appalled　at　the　notion　of　simply　eliminating　Christmas；　but　even　within　this　group　of　critics　Nora　suspected　many　would　secretly　covet　their　cruise。
　And　in　three　months　who'd　care　anyway？
　After　a　few　bites　they　shoved　their　sandwiches　aside　and　brought　out　the　paperwork。　Not　another　word　was　mentioned　about　Christmas；　not　in　Nora's　presence　anyway。　Driving　away；　she　phoned　Luther　with　the　news　of　their　latest　victory。
　Luther　was　up　and　down。　His　secretary；　a　fifty…year…old　triple　divorcee　named　Dox；　had　quipped　that　she'd　have　to　buy　her　own　cheap　perfume；　she　supposed；　since　Santa　wasn't　coining　this　year。　He'd　been　called　Scrooge　twice；　and　each　time　the　name　had　been　followed　by　a　fit　of　laughter。　How　original；　Luther　thought。
　Late　in　the　morning；　Yank　Slader　darted　into　Luther's　office　as　if　angry　clients　were　chasing　him。　Peeking　out　first；　he　closed　the　door；　then　assumed　a　seat。　〃You're　a　genius；　old　boy；〃　he　said　almost　in　a　whisper。　Yank　was　an　amortization　specialist；　afraid　of　his　shadow；　loved　eighteen…hour　days　because　his　wife　was　a　brawler。　
　〃Of　course　I　am；〃　said　Luther。
　〃Went　home　last　night；　late；　got　the　wife　to　bed　then　did　the　same　thing　you　did。　Crunched　the　numbers；　went　through　the　bank　statements；　the　works；　came　up　with　almost　seven　grand。　What　was　your　damage？〃
　〃Just　over　six　thousand。〃
　〃Unbelievable；　and　not　a　rotten　thing　to　show　for　it。　Makes　me　sick。〃
　〃Take　a　cruise；〃　Luther　said；　knowing　full　well　that　Yank's　wife　would　never　agree　to　such　foolishness。　For　her；　the　holidays　began　in　late　October　and　steadily　gathered　momentum　until　the　big　bang；　a　ten…hour　marathon　on　Christmas　Day　with　four　meals　and　a　packed　house。
　〃Take　a　cruise；　Yank　mumbled。　〃Can't　think　of　anything　worse。　Socked　away　on　a　boat　with　Abigail　for　ten　days。　I'd　pitch　her　overboard。〃
　And　no　one　would　blame　you；　Luther　thought。
　〃Seven　thousand　bucks；〃　Yank　repeated　to　himself。
　〃Ridiculous；　isn't　it？〃　Luther　said；　and　for　a　moment　both　accountants　silently　lamented　the　waste　of　hard…earned　money。
　〃Your　first　cruise？〃　Yank　asked。
　〃Yes。〃
　〃Never　done　one　myself。　Wonder　if　they　have　single　folks　on　board？〃
　〃I'm　sure　they　do。　There's　no　requirement　you　have　to　take　a　partner。　Thinking　of　going　solo；　Yank？〃
　〃Not　thinking；　Luther；　dreaming。〃　He　drifted　off；　his　hollow　eyes　showing　a　hint　of　hope；　of　fun；　of　something　Luther　had　never　seen　〃before　in　Yank。　He　left　the　room　there　for　a　moment；　his　thoughts　running　wildly　across　the　Caribbean；　so　wonderfully　alone　without　Abigail。
　Luther　was　quiet　while　his　colleague　dreamed；　but　the　dreams　soon　became　slightly　embarrassing。　Fortunately；　the　phone　rang　and　Yank　was　jolted　back　to　a　harsh　world　of　amortization　tables　and　a　quarrelsome　wife。　He　got　to　his　feet　and　seemed　to　be　leaving　without　a　word。　At　the　door；　though；〃　he　said；　〃You're　my　hero；　Luther。〃
　Vic　Frohmeyer　had　heard　the　rumor　from　Mr。　Scan…Ion；　the　scoutmaster；　and　from　his　wife's　niece；　who　roomed　with　a　girl　who　worked　part　time　for　Aubie　at　The　Pumpkin　Seed；　and　from　a　colleague　at　the　university　；　whose　brother　got　his　taxes　done　by　someone　at　Wiley　&　Beck。　Three　different　sources；　and　the　rumor　had　to　be　true。　Krank　could　do　whatever　he　damned　well　pleased；　but　Vic　and　the　rest　of　Hemlock　wouldn't　take　it　lying　down。
　Frohmeyer　was　the　unelected　ward　boss　of　Hemlock。　His　cushy　job　at　the　university　gave　him　time　to　meddle；　and　his　boundless　energy　kept　him　on　the　street　organizing　all　sorts　of　activities。　With　six　kids；　his　house　was　the　undisputed　hangout。　The　doors　were　always　open；　a　game　always　in　progress。　As　a　result；　his　lawn　bad　a　worn　look　to　it；　though　he　worked　hard　in　his　flower　beds。
　It　was　Frohmeyer　who　brought　the　candidates　to　Hemlock　for　barbecues　in　his　backyard；　and　for　their　campaign　pledges。　It　was　Frohmeyer　who　circulated　the　petitions；　knocking　door　to　door；　gathering　momentum　against　annexation　or　in　favor　of　school　bonds　or　against　a　new　four…lane　miles　away　or　in　favor　of　a　new　sewer　system。　It　was　Frohmeyer　who　called　Sanitation　when　a　neighbor's　garbage　was　not　picked　up；　and　because　it　was　Frohmeyer　the　matter　got　quickly　resolved。　A　stray　dog；　one　from　another　street；　a　call　from　Vic　Frohmeyer；　and　Animal　Control　was　on　the　spot。　A　stray　kid；　one　with　hair　and　tattoos　and　the　leery　look　of　a　delinquent；　and　Frohmeyer　would　have　the　police　poking　him　in　the　chest　and　asking　questions。
　A　hospital　stay　on　Hemlock；　and　the　Frohmeyers　arranged　visitation　and　food　and　even　lawn　care。　A　death　on　Hemlock；　and　they　organized　flowers　for　the　funeral　and　visits　to　the　cemetery。　A　neighbor　in　need　could　call　the　Frohmeyers　for　anything。
　The　Frostys　had　been　Vic's　idea；　though　he'd　seen　it　in　a　suburb　of　Evanston　and　thus　couldn't　take　full　credit。　The　same　Frosty　on　every　Hemlock　roof；　an　eight…foot
　Frosty　with　a　goofy　smile　around　a　corncob　pipe　and　a　black　top　hat　and　thick　rolls　around　the　middle；　all　made　to　glow　a　brilliant　white　by　a　two…hundred…watt　bulb　screwed　into　a　cavity　somewhere　near　Frosty's　colon。　The　Hemlock　Frostys　had　made　their　debut　six　years　earlier　and　were　a　smashing　success…twenty…one　houses　on　one　side；　twenty…one　on　the　other；　the　street　lined　with　two　perfect　rows　of　Frostys；　forty　feet　up。　A　color　photo　with　a　cute　story　ran　on　the　front　page。　Two　television　news　crews　had　done　Live！　reports。
　The　next　year；　Stanton　Street　to　the　south　and　Ackerman　Street　to　the　north　had　jumped　in　with　Rudolphs　and　silver　bells；　respectively；　and　a　mittee　from　Parks　and　Rec；　at　Frohmeyer's　quiet　urging；　began　giving　neighborhood　awards　for　Christmas　decorations。
　Two　years　earlier　disaster　struck　when　a　windstorm　sent　most　of　the　Frostys　airborne　into　the　next　precinct。　Frohmeyer　rallied　the　neighbors　though；　and　last　year　a　new；　slightly　shorter　version　of　Frosty　decorated　Hemlock。　Only　two　houses　had　not　participated。　
　Each　year；　Frohmeyer　decided　the　date　on　which　to　resurrect　the　Frostys；　and　after　hearing　the　rumors　about　Krank　and　his　cruise　he　decided　to　do　it　immediately。　After　dinner；　he　typed　a　short　memo　to　his　neighbors；　something　he　did　at　least　twice　a　month；　ran　forty…one　copies；　and　dispatched　his　six　children　to　hand…deliver　them　to　every　house　on　Hemlock。　It　read：　〃Nei