alistairmaclean.icestationzebra-第21章

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　 〃I　thought　medical　opinion　was　against　alcohol　in　low　temperatures；〃　Hansen　said　doubtfully。　〃Something　about　opening　the　pores。〃
　 〃Name　me　any　form　of　human　activity；〃　I　said；　〃and　I'll　find　you　a　group　of　doctors　against　it。　Spoilsports。　Besides；　this　isn't　alcohol；　it's　very　fine　Scotch　whisky。〃
　 〃You　should　have　said　so　in　the　first　place。　Pass　it　over。　Not　too　much　for　Rawlings　and　Zabrinski：　they're　not　used　to　the　stuff。　Any　word；　Zabrinski？〃
　 Zàbrinski；　with　the　walkie…talkie's　aerial　up　and　one　earphone　tucked　in　below　the　hood　of　his　parka；　was　talking　into　the　microphone　through　cupped　hands。　As　the　radio　expert；　Zabrinski　had　been　the　obvious　man　to　handle　the　walkie…talkie；　and　I'd　given　it　to　him　before　leaving　the　submarine。　This　was　also　the　reason　why　Zabrinski　wasn't　at　any　time　given　the　position　of　lead　man　in　our　trudge　across　the　ice。　A　heavy　fall　or　immersion　in　water　would　have　finished　the　radio　he　was　carrying　slung　on　his　back；　and　if　the　radio　were　finished；　so　would　we　be；　for　without　the　radio；　not　only　had　we　no　hope　of　finding　Drift　Station　Zebra；　we　wouldn't　have　a　chance　in　a　thousand　of　ever　finding　our　way　back　to　the　〃Dolphin〃　again。　Zabrinski　was　built　on　the　size　and　scale　of　a　medium…sized　gorilla　and　was　about　as　durable；　but　we　couldn't　have　treated　him　more　tenderly　had　he　been　made　of　Dresden　china。
　 〃It's　difficult；〃　Zabrinski　said。　〃Radio's　okay；　but　this　ice　storm　causes　such　damn　distortion　and　squeakingno；　wait　a　minute；　though；　wait　a　minute。〃
　 He　bent　his　head　over　the　microphone；　shielding　it　from　the　sound　of　the　storm；　and　spoke　again　through　cupped　hands。　〃Zabrinski　speaking。　。　。　Zabrinski。　Yeah；　we're　all　kinda　tuckered　out；　but　Doc　here　seems　to　think　we'll　make　it。　。。　。　Hang　on；　I'll　ask　him。〃
　 He　turned　to　me。　〃How　far　do　you　think　we've　e；　they　want　to　know。〃
　 〃Four　miles。〃　I　shrugged。　〃Three　and　a　half；　four　and　a　half。　You　guess　it。〃
　 Zabrinski　spoke　again；　looked　interrogatively　at　Hansen　and　me；　saw　our　head　shakes；　and　signed　off。　He　said：　〃Navigating　officer　says　we're　four；　five　degrees　north　of　where　we　should　be　and　that　we'll　have　to　cut　south　if　we　don't　want　to　miss　Zebra　by　a　few　hundred　yards。〃
　 It　could　have　been　worse。　Over　an　hour　had　passed　since　we'd　received　the　last　bearing　position　from　the　〃Dolphin〃；　and；　between　radio　calls；　our　only　means　of　navigating　had　been　by　judging　the　strength　and　direction　of　the　wind　in　our　faces。　When　a　man's　face　is　pletely　covered　and　largely　numb；　it's　not　a　very　sensitive　instrument　for　gauging　wind　directionand；　for　all　we　knew；　the　wind　might　be　either　backing　or　veering。　It　could　have　been　a　lot　worse；　and　I　said　so　to　Hansen。
　 〃It　could　be　worse；〃　he　agreed　heavily。　〃We　could　be　traveling　in　circles　or　we　could　be　dead。　Barring　that；　I　don't　see　how　it　could　be　worse。〃　He　gulped　down　the　whisky；　coughed；　and　handed　the　flask　top　back　to　me。　〃Things　look　brighter　now。　You　honestly　think　we　can　make　it？〃
　 〃A　little　luck；　that's　all。　You　think　maybe　our　packs　are　too　heavy？　That　we　should　abandon　some　of　it　here？〃　The　last　thing　I　wanted　to　was　to　abandon　any　of　the　supplies　we　had　along　with　us：　eighty　pounds　of　food；　a　stove；　thirty　pounds　of　pressed…fuel　tablets；　a　hundred　ounces　of　alcohol；　a　tent；　and　a　very　prehensive　medical　kit。　But　if　it　was　to　be　abandoned；　I　wanted　it　to　be　their　suggestion；　and　I　was　sure　they　wouldn't　make　it。
　 〃We're　abandoning　nothing；〃　Hansen　said。　Either　the　rest　or　the　whisky　had　done　him　good；　his　voice　was　stronger；　his　teeth　hardly　chattering　at　all。
　 〃Let　the　thought　die　still…born；〃　Zabrinski　said。　When　I'd　first　seen　him　in　Scotland；　he　had　reminded　me　of　a　polar　bear；　and　now　out　here　on　the　ice　cap；　huge　and　crouched　in　his　ice…whitened　furs；　he　resembled　one　even　more。　He　had　the　physique　of　a　bear；　too；　and　seemed　pletely　tireless；　he　was　in　far　better　shape　than　any　of　us。　〃This　weight　on　my　bowed　shoulders　is　like　a　bad　leg：　an　old　friend　that　gives　me　pain；　but　I　wouldn't　be　without　it。〃
　 〃You？〃　I　asked　Rawlings。
　 〃I'm　conserving　my　energy；〃　Rawlings　announced。　〃I　expect　to　have　to　carry　Zabrinski　later　on。〃
　 We　pulled　the　scarred；　abraded　and　now　thoroughly　useless　snow　goggles　over　our　eyes　again；　hoisted　ourselves　stiffly　to　our　feet　and　moved　off　to　the　south　to　find　the　end　of　and　round　the　high　ridge　that　had　blocked　our　path。　It　was　by　far　the　longest　and　most　continuous　ridge　we'd　encountered　yet；　but　we　didn't　mind；　we　needed　to　make　a　good　offing　to　get　us　back　on　course；　and　not　only　were　we　doing　just　that；　but　we　were　doing　it　in　parative　shelter　and　saving　our　strength　by　so　doing。　After　perhaps　four　hundred　yards　the　ice　wall　ended　so　abruptly；　leading　to　so　sudden　and　unexpected　an　exposure　to　the　whistling　fury　of　the　ice　storm　that　I　was　bowled　pletely　off　my　feet。　An　express　train　couldn't　have　done　it　any　better。　I　hung　on　to　the　rope　with　one　hand；　clawed　and　scrambled　my　way　back　to　my　feet　with　the　help　of　the　others；　shouted　a　warning　to　the　others；　and　then　we　were　fairly　into　the　wind　again；　holding　it　directly　in　our　faces　and　leaning　far　forward　to　keep　our　balance。
　 We　covered　the　next　mile　in　less　than　half　an　hour。　The　going　was　easier　now；　much　easier　than　it　had　been；　although　we　still　had　to　make　small　detours　around　rafted；　pacted　and　broken　ice：　on　the　debit　side；　all　of　us；　Zabrinski　excepted；　were　near　plete　exhaustion；　stumbling　and　falling　far　more　often　than　was　warranted　by　the　terrain　and　the　strength　of　the　ice　gale。　For　myself；　my　leaden；　'dragging　legs　felt　as　if　they　were　on　fire；　each　step　now　sent　a　shooting　pain　stabbing　from　my　ankle　clear　to　the　top　of　my　thigh。　For　all　that；　I　think　I　could　have　kept　going　longer　than　any　of　them；　even　Zabrinski；　for　I　had　the　motivation；　the　driving　force　that　would　have　kept　me　going　hours　after　my　legs　would　have　told　me　that　it　was　impossible　to　carry　on　a　step　further。　Major　John　Halliwell。　My　elder；　my　only　brother。　Alive　or　dead。　Was　he　alive　or　was　he　dead；　this　one　man　in　the　world　to　whom　I　owed　everything　I　had　or　had　bee？　Was　he　dying；　at　that　very　moment　when　I　was　thinking　of　him；　was　he　dying？　His　wife；　Mary；　and　his　three　children；　who　spoiled　and　mined　their　bachelor　uncle　as　I　spoiled　and　ruined　them：　whatever　way　it　was；　they　would　have　to　know；　and　only　I　could　tell　them。　Alive　or　dead？　My　legs　weren't　mine；　the　stabbing　fire　that　tortured　them　belonged　to　some　other　man；　not　to　me。　I　had　to　know；　I　had　to　know；　and　if　I　had　to　find　out　by　covering　whatever　miles　lay　between　me　and　Drift　Ice　Station　Zebra　on　my　hands　and　knees；　then　I　would　do　just　that。　I　would　find　out。　And　over　and　above　the　tearing　anxiety　as　to　what　had　happened　to　my　brother　there　was　yet　another　powerful　motivation；　a　motivation　that　the　world　would　regard　as　of　infinitely　greater　importance　than　the　life　or　death　of　the　mandant　of　the　station。　As　infinitely　more　important　than　the　living　or　dying　of　the　score　of　men　who　manned　that　desolate　polar　outpost。　Or　so　the　world　would　say。
　 The　demented　drumming　of　the　spicules　on　my　mask　and　ice…sheathed　furs　suddenly　eased；　the　gale　wind　fell　away；　and　I　found　myself　standing　in　the　shelter　of　an　ice　ridge　even　higher　than　the　last　one　we'd　used　for　shelter。　I　waited　for　the　others　to　e　up；　asked　Zabrinski　to　make　a　position　check　with　the　〃Dolphin〃；　and　doled　out　some　more　of　the　medicinal　alcohol。　More　of　it　than　on　the　last　occasion。　We　were　in　more　need　of　it。　Both　Hansen　and　Rawlings　were　in　a　very　distressed　condition；　their　breath　whistling　in　and　out　of　their　lungs　in　the　rapid；　rasping；　shallow　panting　of　a　long…distance　runner　in　the　last　tortured　moments　of　his　final　exhaustion。　I　became　gradually　aware　that　the　speed　of　my　own　breathing　matched　theirs　almost　exactly；　it　required　a　concentrated　effort　of　willpower　to　bold　my　breath　even　for　the　few　seconds　necessary　to　gulp　down　my　drink。　I　wondered　vaguely　if　perhaps　Hansen　hadn't　been　right　after　all；　maybe　the　alcohol　wasn't　good　for　us。　But　it　certainly　tasted　as　if　it　were。
　 Zabrinski　was　already　talking　through　cupped　hands　into　the　microphone。　After　a　minute　or　so　he　pulled　the　earphone　out　from　under　his　parka　and　butto