rl.thebourneidentity-第31章
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'I hit you。 I threatened to kill you。'
'If I'd been you； and men were trying to kill me； I probably would have done the same … if I were capable。'
'So you drove out of Zurich？'
'Not at first； not for a half hour or so。 I had to calm down； reach my decision。 I'm methodical。'
'I'm beginning to see that'
'I was a wreck； a mess； I needed clothes； hairbrush； makeup。 I couldn't walk anywhere。 I found a telephone booth down by the river； and there was no one around； so I got out of the car and called a colleague at the hotel。。。'
〃The Frenchman？ The Belgian？' interrupted Jason。
'No。 They'd been at the Bertinelli lecture； and if they had recognized me up on the stage with you； I assumed they'd given my name to the police。 Instead； I called a woman who's a member of our delegation； she loathes Bertinelli and was in her room。 We've worked together for several years and we're friends。 I told her that if she heard anything about me to disregard it； I was perfectly all right。 As a matter of fact； if anyone asked about me； she was to say I was with a friend for the evening … for the night； if pressed。 That I'd left the Bertinelli lecture early。〃
'Methodical；' said Bourne。
'Yes。' Marie allowed herself a tentative smile。 'I asked her to go to my room … we're only two doors away from each other and the night maid knows we're friends。 If no one was there she was to put some clothes and make…up in my suitcase and e back to her room。 I'd call her in five minutes。'
'She just accepted what you said？'
'I told you； we're friends。 She knew I was all right； excited perhaps； but all right。 And that I wanted her to do as I asked。' Marie paused again。 'She probably thought I was telling her the truth。'
'Go ahead。〃
'I called her back and she had my things。'
'Which means the two other delegates didn't give your name to the police。 Your room would have been watched； sealed off。'
'I don't know whether they did or not But if they did； my friend was probably questioned quite a while ago。 She'd simply say what I told her to say。'
'She was at the Carillon； you were down at the river。 How did you get your things？'
'It was quite simple。 A little tacky； but simple。 She spoke to the night maid； telling her I was avoiding one man at the hotel； seeing another outside。 I needed my overnight case and could she suggest a way to get it to me。 To a car。。。 down at the river。 An off…duty waiter brought it to me。'
'Wasn't he surprised at the way you looked？'
'He didn't have much of a chance to see anything。 I opened the boot； stayed in the car； and told him to put it in the back。 I left a ten…franc note on the spare tyre。'
'You're not methodical； you're remarkable。'
'Methodical will do。'
'How did you find the doctor？'
'Right here。 The concierge； or whatever he's called in Switzerland。 Remember； I'd wrapped you up as best I could； reduced the bleeding as much as possible。 Like most people； I have a working knowledge of first aid； that meant I had to remove some of your clothing。 I found the money and then I understood what you meant by finding a doctor you could pay。 You have thousands and thousands of dollars on you。 I know the rates of exchange。'
That's only the beginning。〃
'What？'
'Never mind。' He tried to rise again； it was too difficult 'Aren't you afraid of me？ Afraid of what you've done？'
'Of course I am。 But I know what you did for me。'
'You're more trusting than I'd be under the circumstances。'
〃Then perhaps you're not that aware of the circumstances。 You're still very weak and I have the gun。 Besides； you don't have any clothes。'
'None？'
'Not even a pair of shorts。 I've thrown everything away。 You'd look a little foolish running down the street in a plastic money belt'
Bourne laughed through his pain； remembering La Ciotat and the Marquis de Chambord。 'Methodical；' he said。
'Very。'
'What happens now？'
'I've written out the name of the doctor and paid a week's rent for the room。 The concierge will bring you meals starting at noon today。 I'll stay here until mid…morning。 It's nearly six o'clock； it should be light soon。 Then I'D return to the hotel for the rest of my things and my airline tickets； and do my best to avoid any mention of you。'
'Suppose you can't？ Suppose you were identified？'
I'll deny it。 It was dark。 The whole place was hi panic。'
'Now you're not being methodical。 At least； not as methodical as the Zurich police would be。 I've got a better way。 Call your friend and tell her to pack the rest of your clothes and settle your bill。 Take as much money as you want from me and grab the first plane to Canada。 It's easier to deny long distance。'
She looked at him in silence； then nodded。 That's very tempting。'
'It's very logical。'
She continued to stare at him a moment longer； the tension inside her building； conveyed by her eyes。 She turned away and walked to the window； looking out at the earliest rays of the morning sun。 He watched her； feeling the intensity； knowing its roots； seeing her face in the pale orange glow of dawn。 There was nothing he could do； she had done what she felt she had to do because she had been released from terror。 From a kind of terrible degradation no man could really understand。 From death。 And in doing what she did； she had broken all the rules。 She whipped her head towards him； her eyes glaring。
'Who are you？'
'You heard what they said。'
'I know what I saw！ What I feel'
'Don't try to justify what you did。 You simply did it； that's all。 Let it be。'
Let it be。 Oh； God； you could have let me be。 And there would have been peace。 But now you have given part of my life back to me； and I've got to struggle again； face it again。
Suddenly； she was standing at the foot of the bed； the gun in her hand。 She pointed it at him and her voice trembled。 'Should I undo it then？ Should I call the police and tell them to e and take you？'
'A few hours ago I would have said go ahead。 I can't bring myself to say it now。'
Then who are you？〃
They say my name is Bourne。 Jason Charles Bourne。'
'What does that mean？ 〃They say〃？'
He stared at the gun； at the dark circle of its barrel。 There was nothing left but the truth … as he knew the truth。
'What does it mean？' he repeated。 'You know almost as much as I do； Doctor。'
'What？'
'You might as well hear it Maybe it'll make you feel better。 Or worse； I don't know。 But you may as well； because I don't know what else to tell you。'
She lowered the gun。 'Tell me what？'
'My life began five months ago on a small island in the Mediterranean called lie de Port Noir
The sun had risen to the midpoint of the surrounding trees； ' its rays filtered by windblown branches； streaming through the windows and mottling the walls with irregular shapes of light。 Bourne lay back on the pillow； exhausted。 He had finished； there was nothing more to say。
Marie sat across the room in a leather armchair； her legs curled up under her； cigarettes and the gun on a table to her left。 She had barely moved； her gaze fixed on his face； even I when she smoked； her eyes never wavered； never left his。 She was a technical analyst； evaluating data； filtering facts as the trees filtered the sunlight
'You kept saying it；' she said softly； spacing out her next words。 ' 〃I don't know。〃。。。 〃I wish I knew。〃 You'd stare at something； and I was frightened。 I'd ask you； what was it？ What were you going to do？ And you'd say it again； 〃I wish I knew。〃 My God； what you've been through。。。 What you're going through。'
'After what I've done to you； you can even think about what's happened to me？'
They're two separate lines of occurrence；' she said absently； frowning in thought。
'Separate？。。。'
'Related in origin； developed independently； that's economics nonsense。。。 And then on the Lowenstrasse； just before we went up to Chernak's flat； I begged you not to make me go with you。 I was convinced that if I heard any more you'd kill me。 That's when you said the strangest thing of all。 You said。。。 〃What you heard makes no more sense to me than it does you。 Perhaps less。。。〃 I thought you were insane。'
'What I've got is a form of insanity。 A sane person remembers。 I don't'
'Why didn't yo
