rj.acrownofswords-第102章
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how displeased he would be if that happened。 Merana thanked the Light that the woman was not staying with any one subject for long。
〃You are sure it was Taim？ And you are sure these blackcoats didn't arrive on horses？〃 Bera answered reluctantly； and Kiruna sullenly； they were as certain as they could be； no one had actually seen the Asha'man e or depart； and the。。。 hole。。。 that brought them all here could have been made by al'Thor。 Which did not satisfy at all； of course。
〃Think！ You aren't silly girls any longer； or shouldn't be。 Phaw！ You must have noticed something。〃
Merana felt ill。 She and the others had spent half the night arguing over what their oath meant before deciding it meant exactly what they had said； with no loopholes to wriggle through。 At last even Kiruna conceded that they must defend and support al'Thor as well as obey； that standing aside in the slightest was not permitted。 What that might mean when it came to Elaida and the sisters loyal to her really concerned no one。 At least； no one admitted any concern。 The mere fact of what they had decided was stunner enough。 But Merana wondered whether Bera or Kiruna had yet realized what she had。 They might just find themselves opposing a legend； not to mention whatever sisters besides Corele and Daigian had chosen to follow her。 Worse。。。 Cadsuane's eyes rested on her for a moment； giving away nothing； demanding everything。 Worse； Merana was sure that Cadsuane knew that very well。
Hurrying along the palace corridors； Min ignored greetings from half a dozen Maidens she knew； just trotted right by without a word in return； never considering that she was being rude。 Trotting was not easy in heeled boots。 The fool things women did for men！ Not that Rand had asked her to wear the boots； but she put them on the first time with him in mind； and she had seen him smile。 He liked them。 Light； what was she doing； thinking about boots！ She should never have gone to Colavaere's apartments。 Shivering； blinking back unshed tears； she began to run。
As usual； a number of Maidens were squatting on their Heels beside the tall doors worked with gilded rising suns。 Their shoufa hung about their shoulders and their spears lay across their knees； yet there was nothing casual about them。 They were leopards； waiting for something to kill。 Usually Maidens made Min uneasy； for all they were friendly enough。 Today； she would not have cared if they were veiled。
〃He is in a foul temper；〃 Riallin warned； but made no move to stop her。 Min was one of the few allowed to enter Rand's presence without being announced。 She straightened her coat and tried to settle herself。 She was not sure why she had e。 Except that Rand made her feel safe。 Burn him！ She had never needed anyone to feel safe before。
Just inside the room； she stopped； aghast。 Automatically； she pushed the door shut behind her。 The place was a shambles。 A few glittering shards clung to some of the mirror frames； but most of the glass lay scattered across the floor。 The dais was on its side； the throne that had stood atop it just gilded flinders where it had been smashed against a wall。 One of the stand…lamps； heavy iron beneath the gilt； had been twisted into a hoop。 Rand sat in one of the smaller chairs in his shirtsleeves； arms dangling and head back； staring at the ceiling。 Staring at nothing。 Images danced about him and colored auras flickered and flared； he was like Aes Sedai in that。 She had no need of Illuminators when Rand or an Aes Sedai was in sight。 He did not move as she walked farther into the room。 He did not seem aware of her at all。 Shattered bits of mirror crunched beneath her boots。 A foul temper； indeed。
Even so； she felt no fear。 Not of him； she could not begin to imagine Rand harming her。 For him； she felt enough to nearly purge the memory of Colavaere's apartments from her head。 She had long since reconciled herself to being hopelessly in love。 Nothing else mattered； not that he was an unsophisticated countryman； younger than she； not who or what he was； not that he was doomed to go mad and die if he was not killed first。 I don't even mind having to share him； she thought； and knew how tightly she was caught if she could lie to herself。 That； she had forced herself to accept； Elayne had a part of him； a claim on him； and so did this Aviendha woman she had yet to meet。 What could not be mended must be lived with； so her Aunt Jan always said。 Especially when your brains had gone soft。 Light； she had always prided herself on keeping her wits。
She stopped beside one of the chairs； where the Dragon Scepter had driven into the thick wooden back so hard that the point stood out nearly a hand behind。 In love with a man who did not know； who would send her away should he ever became aware。 A man she was sure was in love with her。 And with Elayne； and this Aviendha； too； that； she rushed by。 What could not be mended。。。 He was in love with her and refused to admit it。 Did he think that just because mad Lews Therin Telamon had killed the woman he loved； he was fated to as well？
〃I'm glad you came；〃 he said suddenly； still staring at the ceiling。 〃I've been sitting here alone。 Alone。〃 He gave a bitter bark of a laugh。 〃Herid Fel is dead。〃
〃No；〃 she whispered； 〃not that sweet little old man。〃 Her eyes stung。
〃He was torn apart。〃 Rand's voice was so tired。 So empty。 〃Idrien fainted when she found him。 She lay in a stupor half the night； and was nearly incoherent when finally roused。 One of the other women at the school gave her something to make her sleep。 She was embarrassed about that。 When she came to me； she started crying again and。。。 It had to be Shadowspawn。 What else could tear a man limb from limb？〃 Without raising his head； he smacked a fist down on the chair arm so hard the wood creaked。 〃But why？ Why was he killed？ What could he have told me？〃
Min tried to think。 She truly did。 Master Fel was a philosopher； he and Rand discussed everything from the meaning of parts of the Prophecies of the Dragon to the nature of the hole into the Dark One's prison。 He let her borrow books； fascinating books； especially where she had to work to puzzle out what it was they said。 He had been a philosopher。 He would never lend her a book again。 Such a gentle old man； wrapped up in a world of thought and startled when he noticed anything outside it。 She treasured a note he had written to Rand。 He had said she was pretty； that she distracted him。 And now he was dead。 Light； she had had too much of death。
〃I shouldn't have told you； not like that。〃
She gave a start； she had not heard Rand cross the room。 His fingers brushed her cheek。 Wiping away tears。 She was crying。
〃I'm sorry； Min；〃 he said softly。 〃I am not a very nice person anymore。 A man is dead because of me； and all I can do is worry why he was killed。〃
Flinging arms around him； she buried her face against his chest。 She could not stop crying。 She could not stop trembling。 〃I went to Colavaere's apartments。〃 Images flashed in her head。 The empty sitting room； all the servants gone。 The bedchamber。 She did not want to remember； but now she had begun； she could not stop the words tumbling out。 〃I thought； since you'd exiled her； maybe there was some way around the viewing I had of her。〃 Colavaere had been wearing what must have been her finest gown； dark silk that glistened； with falls of delicate aged…ivory Sovarra lace。 〃I thought for once it didn't have to be that way。 You're ta'veren。 You can change the Pattern。〃 Colavaere had donned a necklace and bracelets of emeralds and firedrops； and rings with pearls and rubies； surely her best pieces； and yellow diamonds had been arranged in her hair； a fair imitation of the crown of Cairhien。 Her face。。。 〃She was in her bedchamber。 Hanging from one of the bedposts。〃 Bulging eyes and protruding tongue in a blackened； swollen face。 Toes a foot above the overturned stool。 Sobbing helplessly； Min sagged against him。
His arms went around her slowly； gently。 〃Oh； Min； you have more pain than pleasure from your gift。 If I could take your pain； I would； Min。 I would。〃
Slowly it penetrated that he was trembling； to
