pzb.drawingblood-第36章

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　touched　him。　He　cleared　his　throat。　〃Hello？〃
　　Nothing。　The　doorway　to　the　hall　was　a　black　rectangle；　the　wall　around　it　smeared　with　indistinct　dark　stains。　Zach　stared　at　it；　feeling　worse。　What　had　that　old　hippie　sent　him　into？
　　He　would　just　put　the　box　down　here　on　the　floor　and　turn　around　and　go。　Nothing　to　it。　He　lowered　it　halfway；　his　eyes　never　leaving　the　hall　door。
　　When　a　tall　pale　form　appeared　in　the　doorway；　Zach　stifled　a　scream　and　dropped　the　box。　It　hit　the　floor　and　tipped　over　on　its　side。　A　can　of　Chef　Boyardee　ravioli　rolled　across　the　floor；　disappeared　under　the　couch。　Absurdly；　Zach　wondered　if　Kinsey　had　remembered　a　can　opener。
　　The　pale　form　came　out　of　the　darkness　toward　him。　A　shiftless；　skinny；　ridiculously　beautiful　boy；　long　blond　hair　spilling　over　his　shoulders　and　dirt…smudged　chest；　eyes　wide　and　blazing　and　utterly　mad；　a　rusty　claw　hammer　clutched　in　his　upraised　hand。　He　looked　like　some　malevolent　avenging　angel；　like　a　pissed…off　Christ　e　down　off　the　cross　ready　to　pound　in　some　nails　of　his　own。
　　Zach　stood　paralyzed　as　the　hammer…wielding　angel；　presumably　Trevor；　descended　on　him。　He　could　not　seem　to　make　himself　speak。　He　did　not　want　to　die　like　a　character　in　a　splatter　movie；　did　not　want　to　die　quick　and　stupid　or　slow　and　mean；　with　a　chunk　of　metal　buried　in　his　frontal　lobes　and　syrupy　blood　gradually　obscuring　the　dumb；　startled　expression　frozen　on　his　face　for　all　eternity。　But　even　less　did　he　love　the　idea　of　turning　to　run　and　feeling　the　claw　end　of　the　hammer　take　a　divot　out　of　his　skull。
　　His　heart　caromed　crazily　off　the　walls　of　his　chest。　A　wire…thin　pain　shot　down　his　left　arm。　Maybe　he　would　just　have　a　heart　attack　and　avoid　the　whole　thing。
　　Trevor's　other　hand　snaked　out；　wrapped　long　fingers　round　Zach's　wrist。　His　touch　was　galvanizing；　akin　to　an　electric　shock　or　a　whole　pot　of　coffee。　Zach　thought　his　nerves　might　just　rip　out　of　his　skin　and　go　twining　up　Trevor's　arm　like　the　stinging　tentacles　of　jellyfish。
　　But　his　synapses　refused　to　save　him。　Think；　his　mind　yammered；　flex　your　brain　and　THINK　because　if　you　don't　it's　going　to　end　up　splattered　all　over　this　dirty　floor；　and　is　that　any　fate　for　this　rare　and　superior　organ　that　has　served　you　so　well　for　nineteen　years？　Wanna　go　for　twenty？　Then　HACK　THIS　SYSTEM；　D00D！　What's　the　first　thing　you　need？　THE　PASSWORD！
　　〃TREVOR！〃　he　hollered。　〃NO！！！〃
　　He　had　made　his　voice　as　loud　and　sharp　as　he　could。　He　saw　Trevor　hesitate；　but　his　grip　on　Zach's　wrist　didn't　loosen；　and　the　hammer　stayed　upraised；　ready　to　fall。
　　But　passwords　always　required　more　than　one　try。　〃Trevor！〃　he　shouted　again；　letting　an　extra　edge　of　fear　and　deference　creep　into　his　voice。　〃Kinsey　sent　me！　Please　don't　kill　me！　Please！〃
　　Zach　felt　a　tiny　bright　pain　deep　in　his　head；　wondered　if　that　was　the　spot　where　the　hammer　would　go　in　or　if　he　had　just　managed　to　have　an　aneurysm　instead　of　a　heart　attack。　It　seemed　the　body　always　had　some　time　bomb　lurking　in　its　depths。
　　But　some　of　the　madness　appeared　to　melt　off　Trevor。　His　eyes　met　Zach's；　really　saw　Zach；　and　a　glassy　film　cleared　from　them。　The　black…rimmed　irises　were　the　palest；　most　delicate　ice…blue；　moments　ago　they　had　been　muddy　with　killing　rage。　Now　Trevor　looked　horrified；　and　years　younger。　He　let　go　of　Zach's　wrist。　His　shoulders　sagged。　He　tried　to　swallow　but　could　not　seem　to　work　up　the　spit；　the　curve　of　his　throat　worked　convulsively。　The　skin　there　was　creased　with　sweat　and　grime；　as　if　he　had　not　shaved　or　bathed　in　days。
　　Okay。　You　found　a　crack　in　the　system；　that　doesn't　necessarily　mean　you're　in。　Verify　yourself。　Reassure　the　system　that　you　belong　here。
　　〃Trevor？　I　。。。　didn't　mean　to　scare　you。　My　name's　Zach　and　I'm　new　in　town　too　and　。　。　。　uh；　Kinsey　from　the　club　sent　me　out　to　bring　you　this　stuff。〃
　　The　quicksilver　eyes　flickered；　then　Trevor's　lips　moved。　His　voice　was　deeper　than　Zach　had　expected；　and　very　quiet。　〃You　must　think　I'm　crazy。〃
　　〃Well…〃　said　Zach；　and　stopped。　Trevor　tilted　his　head。　〃Well；　it　would　help　if　you　put　the　hammer　down。〃
　　Trevor　stared　at　the　grisly　tool　in　his　hand　as　if　he　had　no　idea　how　it　had　gotten　there。　Then；　very　slowly；　he　bent　and　placed　the　hammer　on　the　floor。　〃I'm　sorry；〃　he　muttered。　〃I'm　really；　really　sorry。〃
　　Bingo！　In　with　full　user　privileges！　Bells　and　whistles　should　have　been　going　off　in　Zach's　head。　But　he　didn't　feel　as　triumphant　as　he　usually　did　when　he　cracked　a　system。　He　was　starting　to　remember　that　Trevor　was　more　than　a　system；　he　was　a　person；　and　people　were　volatile　things；　and　that　hammer　was　still　within　easy　reach。
　　And　on　top　of　all　that；　the　stricken　look　on　Trevor's　face　and　the　jagged　catch　in　his　voice　were　so　genuine　that　Zach　actually　felt　a　little　sorry　for　him。　He　was　a　beautiful　boy　with　fierce　intelligence　behind　the　craziness　flickering　in　his　eyes。　Zach　wondered　what　had　brought　him　to　this　place；　to　this　extremity。
　　〃You're　the　only　person　who　ever　tried　to　kill　me　that　apologized　for　it　afterward；〃　he　said。　〃So　I　guess　I　accept。〃
　　A　trace　of　a　smile　might　have　crossed　Trevor's　face。　It　was　gone　before　Zach　could　be　sure。　〃How　many　other　people　have　tried　to　kill　you？〃
　　〃Two。〃
　　〃Who　were　they？〃
　　〃My　parents。〃
　　Trevor's　eyes　went　very　wide；　paler　still。　Then　suddenly　they　shimmered　with　tears。　A　couple　spilled　over　the　rims　of　his　eyelids　before　he　could　stop　them；　great　fat　crystal　drops　of　pain。
　　Once　in　a　while　you　happen　purely　at　random　upon　the　right　password　in　a　million；　the　unguessable　code　sequence；　the　needle　in　a　program's　haystack。　Once　in　a　while；　you　just　get　lucky。
　　〃I　can　explain　everything；〃　said　Trevor。
　　
　　The　thought　of　what　he　had　nearly　done　made　Trevor　feel　light…headed。　The　house　spun　around　him；　the　floor　threatened　to　tilt；　to　yawn　wide　open　beneath　his　feet。
　　He　couldn't　remember　what　he　had　been　thinking　as　he　grabbed　Zach's　wrist。　He　wasn't　sure　he　had　been　thinking；　his　mind　had　felt　as　empty　as　the　rooms　of　the　house；　and　that　scared　him　worse　than　anything。
　　〃I　can　explain　everything；〃　he　said；　though　he　doubted　he　really　could；　and　doubted　even　more　that　Zach　would　want　to　hear　it。
　　But　Zach　just　shrugged。　〃Sure；　if　you　want　to　talk　about　it。　I'm　not　hurt。　It's　no　big　deal。〃
　　Trevor　looked　at　him。　Zach　was　trying　to　smile；　but　his　face　was　terribly　pale　in　the　gloom；　and　his　eyes　still　showed　too　much　white。　Even　his　hands　were　shaking。　Trevor　wondered　what　kind　of　threat　Zach　would　consider　a　big　deal。
　　〃I　want　to　talk　about　it；〃　he　said。　〃Let's　go　outside。〃
　　They　walked　around　to　the　side　yard　and　sat　beneath　the　glistening　canopy　of　the　willow。　The　leaves　back　here　were　so　thick　that　the　ground　was　almost　dry；　though　a　shimmer　of　droplets　fell　on　them　from　time　to　time。　Trevor　was　still　shirtless；　and　the　water　beaded　on　his　shoulders；　made　trickling　paths　through　the　dirt　on　his　chest　and　back。
　　Zach　seemed　to　be　watching　him　closely；　waiting　to　hear　what　he　had　to　say。　In　the　daylight　Trevor　saw　that　his　eyes　were　a　startling　shade　of　green；　large　and　slightly　tilted。　His　face　was　fine…boned；　sharp…featured；　interestingly　shadowed　by　his　wild　spiky　hair　and　the　round　black　frames　of　his　glasses。　Trevor　realized　who　Zach　resembled：　his　drawing　of　Walter　Brown；　the　singer　who'd　been　arrested　with　Bird　in　Jackson；　Mississippi。　The　singer　whose　face　Trevor　had　had　to　imagine　because　he'd　never　seen　the　man's　picture。　The　likeness　wasn't　exact；　but　it　was　strong　enough　to　put　him　more　at　ease　with　Zach。　This　was　a　face　he　knew；　a　face　that　pleased　his　eye。
　　Trevor　began　to　talk。　The　words　came　slowly　at　first；　but　soon　he　could　not　stop。　Never　in　his　life　had　he　talked　for　so　long　at　one　time。　He　told　Zach　everything：　the　deaths；　the　orphanage；　the　dreams；　the　things　that　had　happened　since　he'd　been　back　in　the　house。　He　even　talked　about　the　time　he　had　cracked　that　kid's　skull　open　in　the　shower；　though　he　didn't　mention　how　much　he　had　liked　it。
　　He　was　surprised　at　how　good　talking　felt。　Not　since　he　stopped　letting　blood　from　his　arm　with　a　razor　blade　had　he　f