anner.bloodandgold-第115章
按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！
His satin frock coat was a dark blue； and his lace was intricate and extravagant。 It seemed he was studded with immense diamonds； diamonds from India where diamonds are worshiped。 He had a fortune in rings on his hands。 He wore a fortune in buckles and buttons。
〃Marius；〃 he said。 He gave me a small formal bow； as though he were doffing his hat when in fact he wore none。 〃Of course；〃 he said； 〃you are going to see Pandora。〃
〃You mean to stop me？〃 I asked。
〃No；〃 he said with an idle shrug。 〃How could you imagine such a thing？〃 His tone was courteous。 〃Marius； I assure you； she has cast off many another。〃 He seemed perfectly sincere。
〃So I've been told；〃 I said。 〃I must see her。 You and I can speak later on。 I must go to her。〃
〃Very well；〃 he said。 〃I am patient。〃 He shrugged again。 〃I am always patient。 My name is Arjun。 I'm glad that we've finally e together。 Even with the Roman rogue； Santino； who claimed to have annihilated you I was patient。 She was so miserable then and I wanted to punish him。 But I did not。 I followed her wishes and left him unharmed。 What a dejected creature he was。 How he loved her。 I followed her wishes as I've said。 I'll follow her wishes tonight； as I always do。〃
〃That's very good of you；〃 I replied； my throat so tight I could scarcely utter the words。 〃Let me go now。 I have waited longer than you can possibly imagine for this moment。 I can't stand here and
converse with you as though she weren't steps away from me。〃
〃I can imagine how long you've waited；〃 he said。 〃I am older than you think。〃
I nodded； and I slowly withdrew from him。
I couldn't bear it anymore。
Immediately I entered the immense ballroom。
The orchestra was playing one of the soft fluid dances so popular in those times； nothing as spirited as music would later bee； and the lavish room was full of radiant faces and busy dancing figures； and myriad colors。
I peered through the happy crowd； moving slowly along one wall and then another。
Quite suddenly I saw her。 She didn't know I was there。 Her panion had sent her no mental warning。
She was sitting alone； artfully dressed in her fashionable clothes； her satin bodice very tight and graceful； her ornate skirts huge； and her lovely white face framed by her natural brown hair drawn back and up in a fancy style with rubies and diamonds。
I leant against the clavichord； smiling benevolently at the musician who played it with such skill； and then I turned to gaze at her。
How sad was her expression； how remote； how unutterably beautiful。
Was she watching the colors of the room as I watched them？ Did she feel the same gentle love for mortals which I felt？ What would she do when she realized I was watching her？
I didn't know。 I was afraid。 I couldn't know anything until I heard the sound of her voice。 I continued to look。 I continued to savor this moment of bliss and safety。
Suddenly； she saw me。 She picked me out of the hundreds of faces。 Her eyes fixed on me； and I saw the blood rush into her beautiful cheeks and her mouth opened to speak the name Marius。
I heard it over the thin sweet music。
I raised my fingers to my lips； just as Bianca had done only a little while ago； and I blew a kiss to her。
How sad and happy at once she seemed； her mouth opened in a half smile as she gazed at me。 She seemed as frozen in her place as I was。
But this was intolerable。 What were these volumes of silence which divided us！
Quickly I crossed the dance floor and bowed before her。 I lifted her cold white hand； and led her out and into the dance； and would take no resistance from her。
〃No； you're mine； you're mine； do you hear？〃 I whispered。 〃Don't pull away from me。〃
〃Marius； I fear him and he is strong；〃 she whispered in my ear。 〃I must explain to him that we've found each other。〃
〃I don't fear him。 Besides he knows。 What does it matter？〃
We were dancing as if we said no such things to one another。 I held her tight and kissed her cheeks。 I didn't care what the mortals around us might think of this impropriety。 How very absurd was the whole notion。
〃Pandora； my blessed love； if only you could know how long I've waited。 What use is it to tell you now that from the very beginning I have missed you in pure agony？ Pandora； listen to me； don't close your eyes； don't look away。 I knew within the year； the very year； that I had made a dreadful error！〃
I realized that I was turning her too violently： I was pressing her hand too hard。 I had lost the cadence of the dance。 The music was a strange shrill noise in my ears。 I had lost control of everything。
She pulled back to look into my eyes。 〃Take me out on the pavilion；〃 she said。 〃We can talk in the river breeze。 The music makes me dizzy。〃 Immediately I led her through a huge pair of doors and we found ourselves on a stone bench overlooking the river。
I shall never forget how clear it was that night； how much the stars seemed in my favor； and how brilliant the light of the moon on the Elbe。 All around us were pots of flowers； and other couples or groups of mortals who had e to gain a little air before returning to the ballroom。
But in the main we had the shadows to ourselves and I gave way to kissing her。 I felt her perfect cheeks beneath my lips。 I kissed her throat。 I felt her brown hair with its tight waves； which I had so often painted on my wild nymphs as they ran through my thick gardens。 I wanted to pull it loose。
〃Don't leave me again；〃 I said。 〃No matter what is said between us tonight。 Don't leave me。〃
〃Marius； it was you who left me；〃 she said； and I heard a tremor in her voice which frightened me。 〃Marius； that was so long ago；〃 she said sadly。 〃Marius； I wandered so far and wide searching for you。〃
〃Yes； yes； I admit to all；〃 I said。 〃I admit to every error。 How could I guess what it meant to break the tie？ Pandora； I didn't know！ Yea gods； I didn't know！ Believe me； I didn't know。 Tell me you will leave this creature； Arjun； and e back to me。 Pandora； I want nothing short of this！ I can't make pretty words。 I can't recite old poems。
Pandora； look at me。〃
〃I am looking at you！〃 she declared。 〃Don't you see； you blind me！ Marius； don't think I too haven't dreamt of this reunion。 And now you see me in this shame； this weakness。〃
〃What？ I don't care！ What shame and weakness？〃
〃That I'm a slave to my panion； Arjun； that I let him move me through the world； that on my own； I possess no will； no momentum。 Marius； I am nothing now。〃
〃No； that's not true； and besides it doesn't matter。 I'll free you from Arjun。 I have no fear of him whatsoever； and then you'll be with me and all your old spirit will e back to you。〃
〃You dream；〃 she said and the first coldness came into her face and into her voice。 It was in her brown eyes； a coldness that es from sorrow。
〃Are you telling me；〃 I demanded； 〃that you mean to leave me again for this creature？ You think I will stand for it？〃
〃And what are you saying to me； Marius； that you will force me？〃 Her voice was low； distant。
〃But you've told me you're weak； you've told me you're a slave。 Is this not asking for me to force you？〃
She shook her head。 She was ready to weep。 Again I wanted to pull down her hair； to see it loose； to take the jewels out of it。 I wanted to take her face in my hands。
I did it。 I held her face too roughly。
〃Pandora； listen to me；〃 I said。 〃One hundred years ago； I learnt from a strange mortal that in your wanderings with this creature you circled again and again the city of Dresden。 And learning this； I moved myself to this city to wait for you。 Not a night has passed that I have not awakened to look through Dresden to find you。
〃Now that I have you in my arms I have no intention of abandoning you。〃
She shook her head。 She seemed for a moment incapable of speech。 I felt that she was imprisoned in her strange fashionable garments and lost in some painful reverie。
〃But what can I give you； Marius； but what you've already learnt？ The knowledge that I live still； that I endure； that I wander？ With or without Arjun； what does it matter？〃
She turn
