lh.narcissusinchains-第68章

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lly　is　that　bad。〃
　I　managed　to　say；　〃Sorry。〃
　〃Do　you　really　want　to　put　yourself　in　the　midst　of　hundreds　of　us？〃　Rafael　asked。
　〃I　won't　be　bluffed；〃　Reece　said。　〃You　won't　hurt　me。　From　everything　I've　heard　about　Anita；　and　you；　Rafael；　you're　the　good　guys。〃　His　gaze　flicked　to　Micah。　〃Him；　I　don't　know；　but　I　do　know　that　the　swans　have　never　thrown　their　allegiance　to　anyone。　We've　been　autonomous。　The　fact　that　I'm　supporting　Anita　and　her　pard　will　mean　something　to　the　wolves。　We　are　weak　as　battle　allies；　but　that　any　animal　other　than　her　own　would　ally　with　her　pard　will　mean　something　to　their　Ulfric。〃
　I　huddled　on　the　far　corner　of　the　seat；　arms　hugging　my　legs　to　my　chest；　a　position　not　really　meant　to　be　performed　while　wearing　a　shoulder　holster。　But　I　was　literally　holding　on　to　myself；　hugging　my　control　and　my　body。　How　was　I　ever　going　to　get　through　tonight　without　doing　something　embarrassing；　or　deadly？　How　much　worse　was　my　control　going　to　get？
　〃Your　last　swan　king　answered　to　their　now…deceased　lupa；〃　Rafael　said。
　〃So　I've　heard。　Though　technically　he　was　a　swan　prince；　not　a　king。　I　don't　know　what　he　owed　the　old　lupa；　but　I'd　guess　it　was　something　blackmailable；　because　I've　found　some　Polaroids　that　would　make　you　blush。〃
　I　had　to　clear　my　throat　twice　before　I　could　talk。　〃Kaspar　refused　to　be　in　Raina's　dirty　movies；　but　the　price　for　that　was　that　he　helped　audition　people　for　the　films。〃
　Reece　looked　at　me。　〃Audition；　what　do　you　mean？〃
　I　huddled　and　talked；　but　I　was　talking　over　the　pulse　in　my　head；　the　rush　of　blood　in　my　body。　I　wanted　to　be　next　to　Reece。　I　wanted　to　take　a　bite。　Instead；　I　talked。　〃Kaspar　could　change　form　from　swan　to　man　at　will。　Raina　used　him　to　see　if　non…shapeshifters　freaked　when　he　changed　in　the　middle　of　sex。〃
　I　felt　Micah's　reaction　even　from　a　distance。　Reece　looked　horrified。　〃You　saw　this？〃
　〃No；　but　Raina　took　great　delight　in　telling　me　about　it　in　detail。　She　tried　to　get　me　to　watch　one　of　his　auditions；　but　I　had　better　things　to　do。〃
　〃He　did　this　willingly？〃　Reece　asked。
　〃No；〃　I　said。　〃It　was　most　definitely　not　his　choice。　He　seemed　to　hate　it。〃
　〃We　see　the　fact　that　we　can　change　forms　at　will　as　a　great　gift。　We're　one　of　the　few　shapeshifters　that　can　do　it　with　ease。〃
　〃Is　that　because　your　gift　is　either　a　curse　or　a　born　talent；　rather　than　a　disease？〃
　〃We　think　so；〃　he　said。
　〃Kaspar　was　under　a　curse；〃　I　said。
　〃Are　you　wondering　about　me？〃
　Actually　I　was　watching　the　way　his　Adam's　apple　bobbed　when　he　talked；　and　wondering　what　it　would　feel　like　to　fix　teeth　in　his　throat；　but　that　was　probably　a　fact　best　kept　to　myself。　I　kept　talking；　but　I　think　both　Micah　and　Rafael　knew　how　ragged　my　control　was。　I　hugged　myself　and　kept　talking；　because　silence　filled　with　awful　images；　terrible　desires。
　〃Yeah；　I'm　wondering；〃　I　said。
　〃I　was　born　a　swan　king。〃
　〃You　were　born　a　swan　king；　not　a　swanmane。　Does　that　mean　you're　male？　Is　swanmane　only　used　for　women？〃
　He　looked　at　me；　studying　my　face。　〃I　was　born　to　be　their　king。　I'm　the　first　king　in　over　a　century。〃
　〃Everybody　else　is　chosen　to　lead；　or　fights　for　the　right；　but　you　make　it　sound　like　a　hereditary　monarchy；〃　I　said。
　〃It　is；　but　it's　not　bloodlines　that　makes　the　difference；　though　being　a　swanmane　either　runs　in　your　family　or　it　doesn't。　But　I　didn't　inherit　the　title。〃
　〃Then　how　did　you　know？〃　I　asked。
　His　eyes　had　gotten　dark；　dark　gray　like　storm　clouds。　〃The　answer　to　that　is　somewhat　intimate。〃
　〃I'm　sorry；　I　didn't　know。〃
　〃I'll　give　you　the　answer　you　seek；　if　you　answer　a　rather　delicate　question　for　me。〃
　We　stared　at　each　other。　My　heart　rate　was　almost　normal　again。　I　could　look　at　him　without　smelling　the　blood　under　his　skin。　Talking；　listening；　doing　somewhat　normal　things　had　helped。　I　was　a　person；　with　speech　and　higher　functions；　not　an　animal。　I　could　do　this。　Really。　I　eased　out　of　my　little　ball；　slowly。
　〃Ask　and　I'll　let　you　know；〃　I　said。
　〃Did　you　kill　Kaspar　Gunderson；　the　last　swan　king？〃
　I　blinked　at　him。　That　was　unexpected。　The　sheer　surprise　made　my　pulse　rate　speed　up　a　touch。　〃No；　no；　I　didn't。〃
　〃Do　you　know　who　did？〃
　I　blinked　at　him　again。　I　wondered　if　I　could　lie　and　if　he　would　be　able　to　tell；　or　not。　I　finally　stuck　to　the　truth。　〃Yes。〃
　〃Who？〃
　I　shook　my　head。　〃That　I　won't　answer。〃
　〃Why　not？〃
　〃Because　I　would　have　killed　Kaspar　myself　if　he　hadn't　gotten　away。〃
　〃I　know　he　was　responsible　for　several　deaths；　and　that　he　tried　to　kill　you　and　some　of　your　friends；〃　Reece　said。
　〃It　was　a　little　more　diabolical　than　that；〃　I　said。　〃He　was　taking　money　from　hunters　and　supplying　them　with　shifters。〃
　Reece　nodded。　〃He　also　made　the　swanmanes　in　his　care　into　victims。　I　think　that's　what　he　and　the　old　lupa　shared　　sexual　sadism。〃
　〃That's　why　your　girls；　as　you　put　it；　were　at　the　club　with　Nathaniel。〃
　〃Yes；　I　don't　play　those　sorts　of　games；　and　they've　grown　to　crave　it。〃
　I　nodded。　〃I　sympathize；〃　I　said。
　〃You've　answered　my　questions　truthfully；　I　can　do　no　less。〃　He　started　unbuttoning　his　shirt。
　I　looked　at　Micah；　who　shrugged。　I　looked　at　Rafael；　who　shook　his　head。　Nice　that　none　of　us　knew　why　he　was　undressing。
　He　left　the　overshirt　tucked　in　but　started　pulling　the　undershirt　out　of　his　pants。　He　was　about　to　bare　his　soft　underbelly；　and　I　wasn't　a　hundred　percent　sure　my　control　was　up　to　seeing　it。　My　pulse　was　in　my　throat　again。　Since　apparently　neither　of　the　men　was　going　to　ask；　I　asked；　〃Why　are　you　undressing？〃
　〃To　show　you　the　symbol　of　my　kingship。〃
　I　stared　at　him。　〃Excuse　me？〃
　Reece　frowned　at　me。　〃Don't　worry；　Ms。　Blake；　I'm　not　about　to　flash　you。〃
　〃I'm　not　worried　about　you　flashing　me；　Reece；　it's　that　。。。　〃　but　I　never　finished；　because　he'd　bared　the　white；　white　skin　of　his　stomach。　In　the　darkened　car　I　could　still　see　the　pulse　just　behind　his　belly　button。　Hell；　I　could　almost　taste　it　in　my　mouth；　as　if　I'd　already　sunk　teeth　into　that　tender　flesh；　as　if　I　was　already　eating　my　way　through　to　more　vital　things。　Something　was　odd　about　the　hair　on　his　chest。　It　was　almost　too　fine；　too　thin；　too　delicate；　running　in　a　dainty　white　line　down　the　center　of　his　chest　and　spreading　in　an　upside　down　triangle　around　his　belly　button　then　down　into　his　pants。
　I　was　on　the　floorboard　crawling　towards　him；　and　I　didn't　remember　getting　there。　I　stopped；　pressed　against　Micah's　legs。　〃I　don't　remember　leaving　my　seat。　I'm　losing　time。〃
　Micah　put　his　hands　on　my　shoulders。　〃It　happens　when　your　beast　controls　you；　at　first。　The　first　few　full　moons　will　be　almost　plete　blackouts；　until　you　can　begin　to　access　the　memories；　and　that　will　take　work。〃
　Reece　had　leaned　back　across　the　seat；　half…reclining；　and　started　to　undo　his　belt。
　This　close　I　could　see；　or　thought　I　saw　what　was　wrong　with　the　hair　on　his　chest　and　stomach。　I　tried　to　move　forward；　but　Micah　held　me；　hands　tightening　on　my　shoulders。　I　stretched　out　my　hand　and　could　brush　fingertips　over　Reece's　stomach。　The　light　touch　of　my　fingers　over　his　skin　made　him　stop　fussing　with　his　belt；　made　him　look　at　me。
　It　wasn't　hair。　〃Feathers；〃　I　said；　softly；　〃like　the　down　on　a　baby　chicken；　so　soft。〃　I　wanted　to　run　my　hands　over　the　surprising　texture　of　it；　to　roll　my　body　across　the　feathers　and　the　heat　of　his　skin。　I　could　hear　his　heart　in　his　chest　pounding；　and　when　I　looked　up；　I　met　his　gaze。　His　pulse　was　in　his　neck；　like　a　trapped　thing；　and　I　could　taste　his　fear。　That　one　touch　of　my　hand；　the　soft；　dreamy　quality　of　my　voice　had　frightened　him。
　Micah's　arms　wrapped　around　my　neck　and　shoulders　and　drew　me　in　against　his　body　with　his　legs　on　either　side　of　me。　He　leaned　over　me；　his　face　pressed　to　mine；　and　said；　〃Ssshhh；　Anita；　ssshhh。〃　But　it　was　more　than　a　soothing　voice。　I　could　feel　his　beast　calling　to　mine；　as　if　he'd　rolled　his　hand　through　my　body；　but　so　much　larger。　And　that　touch　made　my　body　tighten；　grow　wet。　It　brought　my　own　pulse　into　my　throat。
　〃What　did　you　do？〃　I　sounded　breathless。
　〃The　hunger　can　be　turned　to　sex；〃　Micah　said。
　〃I　wasn't　going　to　feed；〃　I　sai