sidneysheldon.astrangerinthemirror-第12章
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''Quite a few；〃 Mrs。 Tanner agreed。 She glanced at the card she held in her hand。
〃Toby Temple。〃
〃You probably haven't heard the name；'' he explained； 〃because for the last couple of years； I've been 〃
〃Playing repertory in England。〃
He nodded。 〃Right〃
Alice Tanner looked at him and said quietly； 〃Mr。 Temple； Americans are not permitted to play in English repertory。 British Actors Equity doesn't allow it。〃
Toby felt a sudden sinking sensation in the pit of his stomach。 〃You might have checked first and saved us both this embarrassment。 I'm sorry； but we only enroll professional talent here。〃 She started back toward her desk。 The interview was over。
〃Hold it！ 〃 His voice was like a whiplash。 She turned in astonishment。 At that instant； Toby had no idea what he was going to say or do。 He only knew that his whole future was hanging in the balance。 The woman standing in front of him was the stepping…stone to everything he wanted； everything he had worked and sweated for； and he was not going to let her stop him。
〃You don't judge talent by rules； lady！ Okayso I haven't acted。 And why？ Because people like you won't give me a chance。 You see what I mean？〃 It was W。 C。 Fields's voice。 Alice Tanner opened her mouth to interrupt him； but Toby never gave her the opportunity。 He was Jimmy Cagney telling her to give the poor kid a break； and James Stewan agreeing with him； and Clark Gable saying he was dying to work with the kid and Cary Grant adding that he thought the boy was brilliant。 A host of Hollywood stars was in that con！ and they were all saying funny things； things that Toby Temple had never thought of before。 The words； the kes poured out of him in a frenzy of desperation。 He was man drowning in the darkness of his own oblivion； clinging via life raft of words； and the words were all that were keep him afloat。 He was soaked in perspiration； running around the room； imitating the movement of each character who was Bring。 He was manic； totally outside of himself； forgetting here he was and what he was here for until he heard Alice Tanner saying；
〃Stop it！ Stop it！〃 Tears of laughter were streaming down her face。 〃Stop it！〃 she repeated； gasping for breath。 And slowly； Toby came down to earth。 Mrs。 Tanner had taken out a handkerchief and was wiping her eyes。 〃Youyou're insane；〃 she said。 〃Do you know that？〃
Toby stared at her； a feeling of elation slowly filling him； exalting him。 〃You liked it； huh？〃
Alice Tanner shook her head and took a deep breath to hold her laughter and said； 〃Not not very much。〃
Toby looked at her； filled with rage。 She had been laughg at him； not with him。 He had been making a fool of himself。
〃Then what were you laughing at？〃 Toby demanded。
She smiled and said quietly； 〃You。 That was the most Frenetic performance I've ever seen。 Somewhere； hidden beneath all those movie stars； is a young man with a lot of talent。 You don't have to imitate other people。 You're naturally any。〃
Toby felt his anger begin to seep away。
〃I think one day you could be really good if you're willing to work hard at it。 Are you？〃
He gave her a slow； beatific grin and said； 〃Let's roll up our sleeves and go to work。〃
Josephine worked very hard Saturday morning； helping her mother clean the house。 At noon Cissy and some other friends picked her up to take her on a picnic。 Mrs。 Csinski watched Josephine being driven off in the long limousine filled with the children of the Oil People。 She thought： 〃One day something bad is going to happen to Josephine。 I shouldn't let her be with those people。 They're the Devil's children。〃 And she wondered if there was a devil in Josephine。 She would talk to the Reverend Damian。 He would know what to do。
Actors West was divided into two sections： the Showcase group； which consisted of the more experienced actors； and the Workshop group。 It was the Showcase actors who staged plays that were covered by the studio talent scouts。 Toby had been put with the Workshop actors。 Alice Tanner had told him that it might be six months or a year before he would be ready to do a Showcase play。 Toby found the classes interesting； but the magic ingredient was missing： the audience； the applauders； the laughters； the people who would adore him。
In the weeks since Toby had begun classes； he had seen very little of the head of the school。 Occasionally； Alice Tanner Would drop into the Workshop to watch improvisations and give a word of encouragement； or Toby would run into her on his way to class。 But he had hoped for something more intimate。 He found himself thinking about Alice Tanner a great deal。 She was what Toby thought of as a classy dame； and that appealed to him； he felt it was what he deserved。 The idea of her crippled leg had bothered him at first； but it had slowly begun to take on a sexual fascination。 Toby talked to her again about putting him in a Showcase play where the critics and talent scouts could see him。 〃You're not ready yet；〃 Alice Tanner told him。 She was standing in his way； keeping him from his success。 I have to do something about that； Toby decided。
A Showcase play was being staged； and on the opening night Toby was seated in a middle row next to a student named Karen； a fat little character actress from his class。 Toby had played scenes with Karen； and he knew two things about her： she never wore underclothes and she had bad breath。 She had done everything but send up smoke signals to let Toby know that she wanted to go to bed with him； but he had pretended not to understand。 Jesus； he thought； fucking her would be like being sucked into a tub of hot lard。
As they sat there waiting for the curtain to go up； Karen excitedly pointed out the critics from the Los Angeles Times and Herald…Express； and the talent scouts from Twentieth Century…Fox； MGM and Warner Brothers。 It enraged Toby。 They were here to see the actors up on the stage； while he sat in the audience like a dummy。 He had an almost uncontrollable impulse to stand up and do one of his routines； dazzle them； show them what real talent looked like。 The audience enjoyed the play； but Toby was obsessed with the talent scouts； who sat within touching distance； the men who held his future in their hands。 Well； if Actors West was the lure to bring them to him； Toby would use it； but he had no intention of waiting six months； or even six weeks。
The following morning； Toby went to Alice Tanner's office。
〃How did you like the play？〃 she asked。
〃It was wonderful；〃 Toby said。 〃Those actors are really great。〃 He gave a self…deprecating smile。 〃I see what you mean when you say I'm not ready yet。〃
〃They've had more experience than you； that's all； but you have a unique personality。 You're going to make it。 Just be patient。〃
He sighed。 〃I don't know。 Maybe I'd be better off forgetting the whole thing and selling insurance or something。〃
She looked at him in quick surprise。 〃You mustn't；〃 she said。
Toby shook his head。 〃After seeing those pros last night； I I don't think I have it。〃
〃Of course you have； Toby。 I won't let you talk like that。〃
In her voice was the note he had been waiting to hear。 It was not a teacher talking to a pupil now； it was a woman talking to a man； encouraging him； caring about him。 Toby felt a small thrill of satisfaction。 He shrugged helplessly。
〃I don't know； anymore。 I'ts all rifle in this town。 I have no one to talk to。〃
〃You can always talk to me； Toby。 I'd like to be your friend。〃 He could hear the sexual huskiness e into her voice。 Toby's blue eyes held all the wonder in the world as he gazed at her。 As she watched him； he walked over and locked the office door。 He returned to her； fell on his knees； buried his head in her lap and； as her fingers touched his hair； he slowly lifted her skirt； exposing the poor thigh encased in the cruel steel brace。 Gently removing the brace； he tenderly kissed the red marks left by the steel bars。 Slowly； he unfastened her garter belt； all the time telling Alice of his love and his need of her； and kissed his way down to the moist lips exposed before him。 He carried her to the deep leather couch and made love to her。 That evening； Toby moved in w
