annr.pandora-第42章
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rinker children had meant to be judges of the evildoer; and drink only from the condemned; according to her laws。 I saw the god of the dark cave; whom I'd seen in my vision。 I understood all。
I wanted to tell Marius。 But I couldn't。 Not now。 The world was reborn; all systems built upon skepticism or selfishness were as fragile as spiderwebs and meant to be swept away。 My own moments of despair had been nothing more than detours into an unholy and self…centered blackness。
〃The Queen of Heaven;〃 I whispered。 I knew I was speaking in the ancient tongue。 A prayer came to my lips。
〃And Amon Ra; the Sun God; for all his power; shall never conquer the King of the Dead or his bride; for she is the ruler of the starry heavens; of the moon; of those who would bring the sacrifice of the evildoer。 Cursed be those who misuse this magic。 Cursed be those who seek to steal it!〃
I felt myself; a human; held together by the intricate threads of blood which Marius had given me。 I felt the design of its support。 It had no weight; my body。
I was lifted towards her。 Her arm came around me and pulled my hair back from my face。 I put out my arms to embrace her neck because I could do nothing else。 We were too dose for any other possible sign of love。
I felt the soft silk of her real plaited hair; and the coldness and firmness of her shoulders; her arm。 Yet she did not look at me。 She was a petrified thing。 Could she look at me? Did she choose to remain silent; staring forward? Did some evil spell hold her helpless; a spell from which a thousand hymns might waken her?
In my delirium I saw the words engraved in gold pieces among the jewels of her collar: 〃Bring to me the evildoer and I shall drink his blood。〃
It seemed I was in the desert and the necklace was tumbling over and over in the sand; in the wind; rather like the body of the burnt one had tumbled。 Fallen; lost; to be remade。
I felt my head drawn to her neck She had opened her fingers over my hair。 She directed it; that my lips should feel this skin。
〃It's what you want; isn't it?〃 I asked。 But my words seemed remote from me; a pathetic expression of the fullness of my soul。 〃That I am to be your daughter!〃
She tipped her head slightly; away from me; so that I saw her neck I saw the vein displayed; the vein from which she wanted me to drink
Her finger rose gently through my hair; never pulling it or hurting it; merely embracing my head; sending rampant ecstasy through me; and urging my head gently down so that my lips could no longer avoid her shimmering skin。
〃Oh; my adored Queen;〃 I whispered。 I had never known such certainty; such ecstasy without limits or mundane cause。 I had never known such bursting; triumphant faith as my faith in her。
I opened my mouth。 Nothing human could bite through this hard flesh! Yet it gave; as though it were thin; and the blood pumped into me; 〃the Fount。〃 I heard her heart driving it; a deafening force that vibrated in the drums of my ears。 This was not blood。 This was nectar。 This was all that any created being could ever desire。
9
With the nectar flowing into me; there came another realm。 Her ringing laughter filled the corridor; she ran ahead of me; girlish; feline; unencumbered by grandeur。 She beckoned for me to follow。 Out under the stars; Marius sat alone in his soft shapeless garden。 She pointed to him。 I saw Marius rise and take me in
his arms。 His long hair was such a fine adornment。 I saw what she wanted。 It was Marius I kissed in this
vision as I drank from her; it was Marius with whom I danced。
A shower of flower petals descended upon us as upon a bridal couple in Rome; and Marius held my arm as though we had just been wed; and all around us people sang。 There was a flawless happiness; a happiness so keen that perhaps there are those born who never even have the capacity for it。
She stood atop a broad black altar of diorite。
It was night。 This was an enclosed place; filled with people; but it was dark and cool with the sandy wind off the valley floor; and she looked down at the one they offered up to her。 He was a man; his eyes closed; his hands were bound。 He didn't struggle。
She showed her teeth; a gasp rose from the worshipers who filled the place; and then she took the man by the throat and drank his blood。 When she had finished; she let him fall and she held up her arms。
〃All things are cleansed in me!〃 she cried out。 Once again the petals fell; petals of all colors; and peacock feathers waved about us; and branches of palm; and there was singing in great lusty bursts; and the sound of a riotous drum; and she smiled looking down from where she stood; her face remarkably flushed and mobile and human; her black…painted eyes sweeping over her worshipers。
All began to dance; save she; who watched; and then her eyes rose slowly and she looked over their heads; out the high rectangular windows of this place; at the twinkling firmament。 Pipes played。 The dance had bee a frenzy。
A weary and secretive darkness crept into her face; a distraction; as though her soul had traveled out of doors towards Heaven; and then she looked sadly down。 She looked lost。 Anger overcame her。
Then she cried out in a deafening voice; 〃The rogue blood drinker!〃 The crowd fell silent。 〃Bring him to me。〃
The crowd parted to let this struggling furious god be forced to her altar。
〃You dare judge me!〃 he cried。 He was Babylonian; with full long curly locks and beard and mustache。 It took ten mortals to hold him。
〃Into the burning place; in the mountains; in the sun; in the strongest fetters!〃 she cried。 He was dragged away。
Once again she looked up。 The stars grew big and age…old patterns were dear。 We floated under the stars。
A boy in a delicate gilded chair argued with those around him。 The men were old; half…invisible in the darkness。 The lamp shone on the boy's face。 We stood in the door。 The boy was &ail; his little limbs like sticks。
〃And you say;〃 said the incredulous boy; 〃that these blood drinkers are worshiped in the hills!〃
I knew he was the Pharaoh by the sacred lock of hair that grew from his bald head; by the manner in which the others waited upon him。 He looked up in horror as she approached。 His guardians fled。
'Yes;〃 she said; 〃and you will do nothing to stop it。〃
She lifted him; this small fragile boy; and tore at his throat as an animal might do it; letting the blood flood from the fatal wound。 〃Little King;〃 she said。 〃Little Kingdom。〃
The vision ended;
Her cold white skin was dosed beneath my lips。 I kissed her now。 I no longer drank。
I felt my own form; felt myself fall back over her arm; felt myself slipping out of her embrace。
In the dim radiance; her profile remained as it had before; silent and without feeling。 Stark; a face without a blemish or a line。 I sank back into Marius's arms。 Her arm and hand returned to their former rigid position。
Everything was brilliantly clear; the motionless King and Queen; the artful figures fixed in lapis lazuli in the gold mosaics。
I felt a sharp pain in me; in the heart; in the womb; as if someone had stabbed me。 〃Marius!〃 I cried out。
He picked me up and carried me from the chamber;
〃No; I want to kneel at her feet;〃 I said。 The pain took the breath out of me。 I tried not to scream from this pain。 Oh; the world had just been reborn。 And now this agony。
He set me down on the high grass; letting it be crushed under me。 A flood of sour human fluid came out of my womb; even out of my mouth。 I saw flowers right near me。 I saw the friendly Heavens; vivid as in my vision。 The pain was unspeakable。
I knew now why he had removed me from the Shrine。
I wiped at my cheek。 I couldn't bear this filth。 The pain devoured me。 I struggled to see again what she had revealed to me; remember what she said; but there was too much obstruction in this pain。
〃Marius!〃 I cried。
He covered me and kissed my cheek。 〃Drink from me;〃 he said; 〃drink until the pain goes away。 It's only the body dying; drink Pandora; you are immortal。〃
〃Fill me; take me;〃 I said。 I reached down between his legs。
〃It doesn't matter now。〃
But it was hard; this organ I sought; the organ forever lost to the god Os