grrm.astormofswords-第61章

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s　brother　who　died　in　the　snow；　somewhere　off　beyond　the　edge　of　the　world。　Why　should　he？　A　coward's　not　worth　weeping　over。　He　had　heard　his　father　tell　his　mother　as　much；　half　a　hundred　times。　The　Old　Bear　knew　it　too。
　〃Fire　arrows；〃　the　Lord　mander　roared　that　night　on　the　Fist；　when　he　appeared　suddenly　astride　his　horse；　〃give　them　flame。〃　It　was　then　he　noticed　Sam　there　quaking。　〃Tarly！　Get　out　of　here！　Your　place　is　with　the　ravens。〃
　〃I　。　。　。　I　。　。　。　I　got　the　messages　away。〃
　〃Good。〃　On　Mormont's　shoulder　his　own　raven　echoed；　〃Good；　good。
　The　Lord　mander　looked　huge　in　fur　and　mail。　Behind　his　black　iron　visor；　his　eyes　were　fierce。　〃You're　in　the　way　here。　Go　back　to　your　cages。　If　I　need　to　send　another　message；　I　don't　want　to　have　to　find　you　first。　See　that　the　birds　are　ready。〃　He　did　not　wait　for　a　response；　but　turned　his　horse　and　trotted　around　the　ring；　shouting；　〃Fire！　Give　them　fire！〃
　Sam　did　not　need　to　be　told　twice。　He　went　back　to　the　birds；　as　fast　as　his　fat　legs　could　carry　him。　I　should　write　the　message　ahead　of　time；　he　thought；　so　we　can　get　the　birds　away　as　fast　as　need　be。　It　took　him　longer　than　it　should　have　to　light　his　little　fire；　to　warm　the　frozen　ink。　He　sat　beside　it　on　a　rock　with　quill　and　parchment；　and　wrote　his　messages。
　Attacked　amidst　snow　and　cold；　but　we've　thrown　them　back　with　fire　arrows；　he　wrote；　as　he　heard　Thoren　Smallwood's　voice　ring　out　with　a　mand　of；　〃Notch；　draw　。　。　。　loose。〃　The　flight　of　arrows　made　a　sound　as　sweet　as　a　mother's　prayer。　〃Burn；　you　dead　bastards；　burn；〃　Dywen　sang　out；　cackling。　The　brothers　cheered　and　cursed。　All　safe；　he　wrote。　We　remain　on　the　Fist　of　the　First　Men。　Sam　hoped　they　were　better　archers　than　him。
　He　put　that　note　aside　and　found　another　blank　parchment。　Still　fighting　on　the　Fist；　amidst　heavy　snow；　he　wrote　when　someone　shouted；　〃They're　still　ing。〃　Result　uncertain。　〃Spears；〃　someone　said。　It　might　have　been　Ser　Mallador；　but　Sam　could　not　swear　to　it。　Wights　attacked　us　on　the　Fist；　in　snow；　he　wrote；　but　we　drove　them　off　with　fire。　He　turned　his　head。　Through　the　drifting　snow；　all　he　could　see　was　the　huge　fire　at　the　center　of　the　camp；　with　mounted　men　moving　restlessly　around　it。　The　reserve；　he　knew；　ready　to　ride　down　anything　that　breached　the　ringwall。　They　had　armed　themselves　with　torches　in　place　of　swords；　and　were　lighting　them　in　the　flames。
　Wights　all　around　us；　he　wrote；　when　he　heard　the　shouts　from　the　north　face。　ing　up　from　north　and　south　at　once。　Spears　and　swords　don't　stop　them；　only　fire。　〃Loose；　loose；　loose；〃　a　voice　screamed　in　the　night；　and　another　shouted；　〃Bloody　huge；〃　and　a　third　voice　said；　〃A　giant！〃　and　a　fourth　insisted；　〃A　bear；　a　bear！〃　A　horse　shrieked　and　the　hounds　began　to　bay；　and　there　was　so　much　shouting　that　Sam　couldn't　make　out　the　voices　anymore。　He　wrote　faster；　note　after　note。　Dead　wildlings；　and　a　giant；　or　maybe　a　bear；　on　us；　all　around。　He　heard　the　crash　of　steel　on　wood；　which　could　only　mean　one　thing。　Wights　over　the　ringwall。　Fighting　inside　the　camp。　A　dozen　mounted　brothers　pounded　past　him　toward　the　east　wall；　burning　brands　streaming　flames　in　each　rider's　hand。　Lord　mander　Mormont　is　meeting　them　with　fire。　We've　won。　We're　winning。　We're　holding　our　own。　We're　cutting　our　way　free　and　retreating　for　the　Wall。　We're　trapped　on　the　Fist；　hard　pressed。
　One　of　the　Shadow　Tower　men　came　staggering　out　of　the　darkness　to　fall　at　Sam's　feet。　He　crawled　within　a　foot　of　the　fire　before　he　died。　Lost；　Sam　wrote；　the　battle's　lost。　We're　all　lost。
　Why　must　he　remember　the　fight　at　the　Fist？　He　didn't　want　to　remember。　Not　that。　He　tried　to　make　himself　remember　his　mother；　or　his　little　sister　Talla；　or　that　girl　Gilly　at　Craster's　Keep。　Someone　was　shaking　him　by　the　shoulder。　〃Get　up；〃　a　voice　said。　〃Sam；　you　can't　go　to　sleep　here。　Get　up　and　keep　walking。〃
　I　wasn't　asleep；　I　was　remembering。　〃Go　away；〃　he　said；　his　words　frosting　in　the　cold　air。　〃I'm　well。　I　want　to　rest。〃
　〃Get　up。〃　Grenn's　voice；　harsh　and　husky。　He　loomed　over　Sam；　his　blacks　crusty　with　snow。　〃There's　no　resting；　the　Old　Bear　said。　You'll　die。〃
　〃Grenn。〃　He　smiled。　〃No；　truly；　I'm　good　here。　You　just　go　on。　I'll　catch　you　after　I've　rested　a　bit　longer。〃
　〃You　won't。〃　Grenn's　thick　brown　beard　was　frozen　all　around　his　mouth。　It　made　him　look　like　some　old　man。　〃You'll　freeze；　or　the　Others　will　get　you。　Sam；　get　up！〃
　The　night　before　they　left　the　Wall；　Pyp　had　teased　Grenn　the　way　he　did；　Sam　remembered；　smiling　and　saying　how　Grenn　was　a　good　choice　for　the　ranging；　since　he　was　too　stupid　to　be　terrified。　Grenn　hotly　denied　it　until　he　realized　what　he　was　saying。　He　was　stocky　and　thick…necked　and　strong…Ser　Alliser　Thorne　had　called　him　〃Aurochs；〃　the　same　way　he　called　Sam　〃Ser　Piggy〃　and　Jon　〃Lord　Snow〃…but　he　had　always　treated　Sam　nice　enough。　That　was　only　because　of　Jon；　though。　If　it　weren't　for　Jon；　none　of　them　would　have　liked　me。　And　now　Jon　was　gone；　lost　in　the　Skirling　Pass　with　Qhorin　Halfhand；　most　likely　dead。　Sam　would　have　cried　for　him；　but　those　tears　would　only　freeze　as　well；　and　he　could　scarcely　keep　his　eyes　open　now。
　A　tall　brother　with　a　torch　stopped　beside　them；　and　for　a　wonderful　moment　Sam　felt　the　warmth　on　his　face。　〃Leave　him；〃　the　man　said　to　Grenn。　〃If　they　can't　walk；　they're　done。　Save　your　strength　for　yourself；　Grenn。〃
　〃He'll　get　up；〃　Grenn　replied。　〃He　only　needs　a　hand。〃
　The　man　moved　on；　taking　the　blessed　warmth　with　him。　Grenn　tried　to　pull　Sam　to　his　feet。　〃That　hurts；〃　he　plained。　〃Stop　it。　Grenn；　you're　hurting　my　arm。　Stop　it。〃
　〃You're　too　bloody　heavy。〃　Grenn　jammed　his　hands　into　Sam's　armpits；　gave　a　grunt；　and　hauled　him　upright。　But　the　moment　he　let　go；　the　fat　boy　sat　back　down　in　the　snow。　Grenn　kicked　him；　a　solid　thump　that　cracked　the　crust　of　snow　around　his　boot　and　sent　it　flying　everywhere。　〃Get　up！〃　He　kicked　him　again。　〃Get　up　and　walk。　You　have　to　walk。〃
　Sam　fell　over　sideways；　curling　up　into　a　tight　ball　to　protect　himself　from　the　kicks。　He　hardly　felt　them　through　all　his　wool　and　leather　and　mail；　but　even　so；　they　hurt。　I　thought　Grenn　was　my　friend。　You　shouldn't　kick　your　friends。　Why　won't　they　let　me　be？　I　just　need　to　rest；　that's　all；　to　rest　and　sleep　some；　and　maybe　die　a　little。
　〃if　you　take　the　torch；　I　can　take　the　fat　boy。〃
　Suddenly　he　was　jerked　up　into　the　cold　air；　away　from　his　sweet　soft　snow；　he　was　floating。　There　was　an　arm　under　his　knees；　and　another　one　under　his　back。　Sam　raised　his　head　and　blinked。　A　face　loomed　close；　a　broad　brutal　face　with　a　flat　nose　and　small　dark　eyes　and　a　thicket　of　coarse　brown　beard。　He　had　seen　the　face　before；　but　it　took　him　a　moment　to　remember。　Paul。　Small　Paul。　Melting　ice　ran　down　into　his　eyes　from　the　heat　of　the　torch。　〃Can　you　carry　him？〃　he　heard　Grenn　ask。
　〃I　carried　a　calf　once　was　heavier　than　him。　I　carried　him　down　to　his　mother　so　he　could　get　a　drink　of　milk。〃
　Sam's　head　bobbed　up　and　down　with　every　step　that　Small　Paul　took。　〃Stop　it；〃　he　muttered；　〃put　me　down；　I'm　not　a　baby。　I'm　a　man　of　the　Night's　Watch。〃　He　sobbed。　〃Just　let　me　die。〃
　〃Be　quiet；　Sam；〃　said　Grenn。　〃Save　your　strength。　Think　about　your　sisters　and　brother。　Maester　Aemon。　Your　favorite　foods。　Sing　a　song　if　you　like。〃
　〃Aloud？〃
　〃In　your　head。〃
　Sam　knew　a　hundred　songs；　but　when　he　tried　to　think　of　one　he　couldn't。　The　words　had　all　gone　from　his　head。　He　sobbed　again　and　said；　〃I　don't　know　any　songs；　Grenn。　I　did　know　some；　but　now　I　don't。〃
　〃Yes　you　do；〃　said　Grenn。　〃How　about　'The　Bear　and　the　Maiden　Fair'　everybody　knows　that　one。　A　bear　there　was；　a　bear；　a　bear！　All　black　and　brown　and　covered　with　hair！〃
　〃No；　not　that　one；〃　Sam　pleaded。　The　bear　that　had　e　up　the　Fist　had　no　hair　left　on　its　rotted　flesh。　He　didn't　want　to　think　about　bears。　〃No　songs。　Please；　Grerm。〃
　〃Think　about　your　ravens；　then。〃
　〃They　were　never　mine。〃　They　were　the　Lord　mander's　ravens；　the　ravens　of　the　Night's　Watch。　〃They　belonged　to　Castle　Black　and　the　Shadow　Tower。〃
　Small　Paul　frowned。　〃Chett　said　I　could　have　the　Old　Bear's　raven；　the　one　that　talks。　I　saved　food　for　it　and　everything。〃