sk.thegunslinger-第33章

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oached　it　　that　would　be　wonderful　magic　indeed）；　but　gradually　the　gunslinger　realized　that　it　was　widening；　being　more　defined。　They　were　still　below　it；　but　the　tracks　were　still　rising。
The　boy　gave　a　surprised　grunt　and　suddenly　lurched　to　the　side；　arms　pinwheeling　in　slow；　wide　revolutions。　It　seemed　that　he　tottered　on　the　brink　for　a　very　long　time　indeed　before　stepping　forward　again。
〃It　almost　went　on　me；〃　he　said　softly；　without　emotion。　〃Step　over。〃
The　gunslinger　did　so。　The　crosstie　the　boy　had　stepped　on　had　given　way　almost　entirely　and　flopped　downward　lazily；　swinging　easily　on　a　disintegrating　rivet；　like　a　shutter　on　a　haunted　window。
Upward；　still　upward。　It　was　a　nightmare　walk　and　so　seemed　to　go　on　much　longer　than　it　did；　the　air　itself　seemed　to　thicken　and　bee　like　taffy；　and　the　gunslinger　felt　as　if　he　might　be　swimming　rather　than　walking。　Again　and　again　his　mind　tried　to　turn　itself　to　thoughtful；　lunatic　consideration　of　the　awful　space　between　this　trestle　and　the　river　below。　His　brain　viewed　it　in　spectacular　detail；　and　how　it　would　be：　The　scream　of　twisting　metal；　the　lurch　as　his　body　slid　off　to　the　side；　the　grabbing　for　nonexistent　handholds　with　the　fingers；　the　swift　rattle　of　bootheels　on　treacherous；　rotted　steel　　and　then　down；　turning　over　and　over；　the　warm　spray　in　his　crotch　as　his　bladder　let　go；　the　rush　of　wind　against　his　face；　rippling　his　hair　up　in　cartoon　fright；　pulling　his　eyelids　back；　the　dark　water　rushing　to　meet　him；　faster；　outstripping　even　his　own　scream　
Metal　screamed　beneath　him　and　he　stepped　past　it　unhurriedly；　shifting　his　weight；　not　thinking　of　the　drop；　or　of　how　far　they　had　e；　or　of　how　far　was　left。　Not　thinking　that　the　boy　was　expendable　and　that　the　sale　of　his　honor　was　now；　at　last；　nearly　negotiated。
〃Three　ties　out　here；〃　the　boy　said　coolly。　〃I'm　going　to　jump。　Here！　Here！〃
The　gunslinger　saw　him　silhouetted　for　a　moment　against　the　daylight；　an　awkward；　hunched　spread…eagle。　He　landed　and　the　whole　edifice　swayed　drunkenly。　Metal　beneath　them　protested　and　something　far　below　fell；　first　with　a　crash；　then　with　the　sound　of　deep　water。
〃Are　you　over？〃　The　gunslinger　asked。
〃Yes；〃　the　boy　said　remotely；　〃but　it's　very　rotten。　I　don't　think　it　will　hold　you。　Me；　but　not　you。　Go　back　now。　Go　back　now　and　leave　me　alone。〃
His　voice　was　hysterical；　cold　but　hysterical。
The　gunslinger　stepped　over　the　break。　One　large　step　did　it。　The　boy　was　shuddering　helplessly。　〃Go　back。　I　don't　want　you　to　kill　me。〃
〃For　Christ's　sake；　walk；〃　the　gunslinger　said　roughly。　''It's　going　to　fall　down。〃
The　boy　walked　drunkenly　now；　his　hands　held　out　shudderingly　before　him；　fingers　splayed。
They　went　up。
Yes；　it　was　much　more　rotten　now。　There　were　frequent　breaks　of　one；　two；　even　three　ties；　and　the　gunslinger　expected　again　and　again　that　they　would　find　the　long　empty　space　between　rails　that　would　either　force　them　back　or　make　them　walk　on　the　rails　themselves；　balanced　giddily　over　the　chasm。
He　kept　his　eyes　fixed　on　the　daylight。
The　glow　had　taken　on　a　color　　blue　　and　as　it　came　closer　it　became　softer；　paling　the　radiance　of　the　phosphor　as　it　mixed　with　it。　Fifty　yards　or　a　hundred？　He　could　not　say。
They　walked；　and　now　he　looked　at　his　feet；　crossing　from　tie　to　tie。　When　he　looked　again；　the　glow　had　grown　to　a　hole；　and　it　was　not　a　light　but　a　way　out。　They　were　almost　there。
Thirty　yards；　yes。　Ninety　short　feet。　It　could　be　done。　Perhaps　they　would　have　the　man　in　black　yet。　Perhaps；　in　the　bright　sunlight　the　evil　flowers　in　his　mind　would　shrivel　and　anything　would　be　possible。
The　sunlight　was　blocked　out。
He　looked　up；　startled；　staring；　and　saw　a　silhouette　filling　the　light；　eating　it　up；　allowing　only　chinks　of　mocking　blue　around　the　outline　of　shoulders；　the　fork　of　crotch。
〃Hello；　boys！〃
The　man　in　black's　voice　echoed　to　them；　amplified　in　this　natural　throat　of　stone；　the　sarcasm　taking　on　mighty　overtones。　Blindly；　the　gunslinger　sought　the　jawbone；　but　it　was　gone；　lost　somewhere；　used　up。
He　laughed　above　them　and　the　sound　crashed　around　them；　reverberating　like　surf　in　a　filling　cave。　The　boy　screamed　and　tottered；　a　windmill　again；　arms　gyrating　through　the　scant　air。
Metal　ripped　and　sloughed　beneath　them；　the　rails　canted　through　a　slow　and　dreamy　twisting。　The　boy　plunged；　and　one　hand　flew　up　like　a　gull　in　the　darkness；　up；　up；　and　then　he　hung　over　the　pit；　he　dangled　there；　his　dark　eyes　staring　up　at　the　gunslinger　in　final　blind　lost　knowledge。
〃Help　me。〃
Booming；　racketing：　〃e　now；　gunslinger。　Or　catch　me　never！〃
All　chips　on　the　table。　Every　card　up　but　one。　The　boy　dangled；　a　living　Tarot　card；　the　hanged　man；　the　Phoenician　sailor；　innocent　lost　and　barely　above　the　wave　of　a　stygian　sea。
Wait　then；　wait　awhile。
〃Do　I　go？〃　The　voice　so　loud；　he　makes　it　hard　to　think；　the　power　to　cloud　men's　minds。　。　。　。
Don't　make　it　bad；　take　a　sad　song　and　make　it　better。　。　。　。　〃Help　me。〃
The　trestle　had　begun　to　twist　further；　screaming；　pulling　loose　from　itself；　giving　〃Then　I　shall　leave　you。〃
〃No！〃
His　legs　carried　him　in　a　sudden　leap　through　the　entropy　that　held　him；　above　the　dangling　boy；　into　a　skidding；　plunging　rush　toward　the　light　that　offered；　the　Tower　frozen　on　the　retina　of　his　mind's　eye　in　a　black　frieze；　suddenly　silence；　the　silhouette　gone；　even　the　beat　of　his　heart　gone　as　the　trestle　settled　further；　beginning　its　final　slow　dance　to　the　depths；　tearing　loose；　his　hand　finding　the　rocky；　lighted　lip　of　damnation；　and　behind　him；　in　the　dreadful　silence；　the　boy　spoke　from　too　far　beneath　him。
〃Go　then。　There　are　other　worlds　than　these。〃
It　tore　away　from　him；　the　whole　weight　of　it；　and　as　he　pulled　himself　up　and　through　to　the　light　and　the　breeze　and　the　reality　of　a　new　karma　（we　all　shine　on）；　he　twisted　his　head　back；　for　a　moment　in　his　agony　striving　to　be　Janus　but　there　was　nothing；　only　plummeting　silence；　for　the　boy　made　no　sound。
Then　he　was　up；　pulling　his　legs　through　onto　the　rocky　escarpment　that　looked　toward　a　grassy　plain　at　the　descending　foot；　toward　where　the　man　in　black　stood　spread…legged；　with　arms　crossed。
The　gunslinger　stood　drunkenly；　pallid　as　a　ghost；　eyes　huge　and　swimming　beneath　his　forehead；　shirt　smeared　with　the　white　dust　of　his　final；　lunging　crawl。　It　came　to　him　that　he　would　always　flee　murder。　It　came　to　him　that　there　would　be　further　degradations　of　the　spirit　ahead　that　might　make　this　one　seem　infinitesimal；　and　yet　he　would　still　flee　it；　down　corridors　and　through　cities；　from　bed　to　bed；　he　would　flee　the　boy's　face　and　try　to　bury　it　in　cunts　or　even　in　further　destruction；　only　to　enter　one　final　room　and　find　it　looking　at　him　over　a　candle　flame。　He　had　bee　the　boy；　the　boy　had　bee　him。　He　was　a　wurderlak；　lycanthropus　of　his　own　making；　and　in　deep　dreams　he　would　bee　the　boy　and　speak　strange　tongues。
This　is　death。　Is　it？　Is　it？
He　walked　slowly；　drunkenly　down　the　rocky　hill　toward　where　the　man　in　black　waited。　Here　the　tracks　had　been　worn　away；　under　the　sun　of　reason；　and　it　was　as　if　they　had　never　been。
The　man　in　black　pushed　his　hood　away　with　the　backs　of　both　hands；　laughing。
〃So！〃　he　cried。　〃Not　an　end；　but　the　end　of　the　beginning；　eh？　You　progress；　gunslinger！　You　progress！　Oh；　how　I　admire　you！〃
The　gunslinger　drew　with　blinding　speed　and　fired　twelve　times。　The　gun…flashes　dimmed　the　sun　itself；　and　the　pounding　of　the　explosions　slammed　back　from　the　rock…faced　escarpments　behind　them。
〃Now；〃　the　man　in　black　said；　laughing。　〃Oh；　now。　We　make　great　magic　together；　you　and　I。　You　kill　me　no　more　than　you　kill　yourself。〃
He　withdrew；　walking　backwards；　facing　the　gunslinger；　grinning。　〃e。　e。　e。〃
The　gunslinger　followed　him　in　broken　boots　to　the　place　of　counseling。
　
　
THE　GUNSLINGER　AND　THE　DARKMAN
I
The　man　in　black　led　him　to　an　ancient　killing　ground　to　make　palaver。　The　gunslinger　knew　it　immediately；　a　Golgotha；　place…of…the…skull。　And　bleached　skulls　stared　blandly　up　at　them　…　cattle；　coyotes；　deer；　rabbits。　Here　the　alabaster　xylophone　of　a　hen　pheasant　killed　as　she　fed；　there　the　tiny；　delicate　bones　of　a　mole；　perhaps　killed　for　pleasure　by　a　wild　dog。
The　Golgo