sk.thegunslinger-第17章

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〃He'll　tell　Cort。〃
〃He's　no　friend　of　Cort's。〃　Roland　said；　and　then　shrugged。　〃And　what　if　he　did？〃
Cuthbert　grinned　back。　〃Sure。　Right。　I　always　wanted　to　know　how　the　world　looked　when　your　head　was　on　backwards　and　upside　down。〃
They　started　back　together　over　the　green　lawns；　casting　shadows　in　the　fine　white　spring　light。
The　cook　in　the　west　kitchen　was　named　Hax。　He　stood　huge　in　food　stained　whites；　a　man　with　a　crude…oil　plexion　whose　ancestry　was　a　quarter　black；　a　quarter　yellow；　a　quarter　from　the　South　Islands；　now　almost　forgotten　（the　world　had　moved　on）；　and　a　quarter　God　knew　what　He　shuffled　about　three　high…ceilinged　steamy　rooms　like　a　tractor　in　low　gear；　wearing　huge；　Caliph…like　slippers。　He　was　one　of　those　quite　rare　adults　who　municate　with　small　children　fairly　well　and　who　love　them　all　impartially　　not　in　a　sugary　way　but　in　a　businesslike　fashion　that　may　sometimes　entail　a　hug；　in　the　same　way　that　closing　a　big　business　deal　may　call　for　a　handshake。　He　even　loved　the　boys　who　had　begun　The　Training；　although　they　were　different　from　other　children　　not　always　demonstrative　and　somehow　dangerous；　not　in　an　adult　way；　but　rather　as　if　they　were　ordinary　children　with　a　slight　touch　of　madness　　and　Cuthbert　was　not　the　first　of　Cort's　students　whom　he　had　fed　on　the　sly。　At　this　moment　　one　of　six　working　appliances　left　on　the　whole　estate。　It　was　his　personal　domain；　and　he　stood　there　watching　the　two　boys　bolt　the　gravied　meat　scraps　he　had　produced。　Behind；　before；　and　all　around；　cookboys；　scullions；　and　various　underlings　rushed　through　the　foaming；　humid　air；　rattling　pans；　stirring　stew；　slaving　over　potatoes　and　vegetables　in　nether　regions。　In　the　dimly　lit　pantry　alcove；　a　washerwoman　with　a　doughy；　miserable　face　and　hair　caught　up　in　a　rag　splashed　water　around　on　the　floor　with　a　mop。
One　of　the　scullery　boys　rushed　up　with　a　man　from　the　Guards　in　tow。　〃This　man；　he　wantchoo；　Hax。〃
〃All　right〃　Hax　nodded　to　the　Guard；　and　he　nodded　back。　〃You　boys；〃　he　said。　〃Go　over　to　Maggie；　she'll　give　you　some　pie。　Then　scat〃
They　nodded　and　went　over　to　Maggie；　who　gave　them　huge　wedges　of　pie　on　dinner　plates。。。　but　gingerly；　as　if　they　were　wild　dogs　that　might　bite　her。
〃Let's　eat　it　on　the　stairs；〃　Cuthbert　said。
〃All　right〃
They　sat　behind　a　huge；　sweating　stone　colonnade；　out　of　sight　of　the　kitchen；　and　gobbled　their　pie　with　their　fingers。　It　was　only　moments　later　that　they　saw　shadows　fall　on　the　far　curving　wall　of　the　wide　staircase。　Roland　grabbed　Cuthbert's　arm。　〃e　on；〃　he　said。　〃Someone's　ing。〃　Cuthbert　looked　up；　his　face　surprised　and　berry…stained。
But　the　shadows　stopped；　still　out　of　sight　It　was　Hax　and　the　man　from　the　Guards。　The　boys　sat　where　they　were。　If　they　moved　now；　they　might　be　heard。
〃。。。　。　the　good　man；〃　the　Guard　was　saying。
〃In　Farson？〃
〃In　two　weeks；〃　the　Guard　replied。　〃Maybe　three。　You　have　to　e　with　us。　There's　a　shipment　from　the　freight　depot。。。。　〃A　particularly　loud　crash　of　pots　and　pans　and　a　volley　of　catcalls　directed　at　the　hapless　potboy　who　had　dropped　them　blotted　out　some　of　the　rest；　then　the　boys　heard　the　Guard　finish：　〃。。　。　poisoned　meat〃
〃Risky。〃
〃Ask　not　what　the　good　man　can　do　for　you　　〃the　Guard　began。
〃　but　what　you　can　do　for　him；〃　Hax　sighed。　〃Soldier；　ask　not〃
〃You　know　what　it　could　mean；〃　the　Guard　said　quietly。
〃Yes。　And　I　know　my　responsibilities　to　him；　you　don't　need　to　lecture　me。　I　love　him　just　as　you　do。〃
〃All　right　The　meat　will　be　marked　for　short…term　storage　in　your　coldrooms。　But　you'll　have　to　be　quick。　You　must　understand　that。〃
〃There　are　children　in　Farson？〃　The　cook　asked　sadly。　It　was　not　really　a　question。
〃Children　everywhere；〃　the　Guard　said　gently。　〃It's　the　children　we　　and　he　　care　about。〃
〃Poisoned　meat。　Such　a　strange　way　to　care　for　children。〃　Hax　uttered　a　heavy；　whistling　sigh。　〃Will　they　curdle　and　hold　their　bellies　and　cry　for　their　mammas？　I　suppose　they　will。〃
〃It　will　be　like　a　going　to　sleep；〃　the　Guard　said；　but　his　voice　was　too　confidently　reasonable。
〃Of　course；〃　Hax　said；　and　laughed。
〃You　said　it　yourself。　'Soldier；　ask　not'　Do　you　enjoy　seeing　children　under　the　rule　of　the　gun；　when　they　could　be　under　his　hand　who　makes　the　lion　lie　down　with　the　lamb？〃
Hax　did　not　reply。
〃I　go　on　duty　in　twenty　minutes；〃　the　Guard　said；　his　voice　once　more　calm。　〃Give　me　a　joint　of　mutton　and　I　will　pinch　one　of　your　girls　and　make　her　giggle。　When　I　leave　　〃My　mutton　will　give　no　cramps　to　your　belly；　Robeson。〃
〃Will　you。。。　〃But　the　shadows　moved　away　and　the　voices　were　lost。
I　could　have　killed　them；　Roland　thought；　frozen　and　fascinated。　I　could　have　killed　them　both　with　my　knife；　slit　their　throats　like　hogs。　He　looked　at　his　hands；　now　stained　with　gravy　and　berries　as　well　as　dirt　from　the　day's　lessons。
〃Roland。〃
He　looked　at　Cuthbert。　They　looked　at　each　other　for　a　long　moment　in　the　fragrant　semidarkness；　and　a　taste　of　warm　despair　rose　in　Roland's　throat。　What　he　felt　might　have　been　a　sort　of　death　　something　as　brutal　and　final　as　the　death　of　the　dove　in　the　white　sky　over　the　games　field。　Hax？　He　thought；　bewildered。　Hax　who　put　a　poultice　on　my　leg　that　time？　Hax？　And　then　his　mind　snapped　closed；　cutting　the　subject　off。
What　he　saw；　even　in　Cuthbert's　humorous；　intelligent　face；　was　nothing　　nothing　at　all。　Cuthbert's　eyes　were　flat　with　Hax's　doom。　In　Cuthbert's　eyes；　it　had　already　happened。　He　had　fed　them　and　they　had　gone　to　the　stairs　to　eat　and　then　Hax　had　brought　the　Guard　named　Robeson　to　the　wrong　corner　of　the　kitchen　for　their　treasonous　little　tete…a…tete。　That　was　all。　In　Cuthbert's　eyes　Roland　saw　that　Hax　would　die　for　his　treason　as　a　viper　dies　in　a　pit。　That；　and　nothing　else。　Nothing　at　all。
They　were　gunslinger's　eyes。
Roland's　father　was　only　just　back　from　the　uplands；　and　he　looked　out　of　place　amid　the　drapes　and　the　chiffon　fripperies　of　the　main　receiving　hall　that　the　boy　had　only　lately　been　granted　access　to；　as　a　sign　of　his　apprenticeship。
His　father　was　dressed　in　black　jeans　and　a　blue　work　shirt。　His　cloak；　dusty　and　streaked；　torn　to　the　lining　in　one　place；　was　slung　carelessly　over　his　shoulder　with　no　regard　for　the　way　it　and　he　clashed　with　the　elegance　of　the　room。　He　was　desperately　thin　and　the　heavy　handlebar　mustache　below　his　nose　seemed　to　weight　his　head　as　he　looked　down　at　his　son。　The　guns　crisscrossed　over　the　wings　of　his　hips　hung　at　the　perfect　angle　for　his　hands；　the　worn　sandalwood　handles　looking　dull　and　sleepy　in　this　languid　indoor　light
〃The　head　cook；〃　his　father　said　softly。　〃Imagine　it！　The　tracks　that　were　blown　upland　at　the　railhead。　The　dead　stock　in　Hendrickson。　And　perhaps　even。。；　imagine！　Imagine！〃
He　looked　more　closely　at　his　son。
〃It　preys　on　you。〃
〃Like　the　hawk；〃　Roland　said。　〃It　preys　on　you。〃　He　laughed　　at　the　startling　appropriateness　of　the　image　rather　than　at　any　lightness　in　the　situation。
His　father　smiled。
〃Yes；〃　Roland　said。　〃I　guess　it。。。　it　preys　on　me。
〃Cuthbert　was　with　you；〃　his　father　said。　〃He　will　have　told　his　father　by　now。〃
〃Yes。〃
〃He　fed　both　of　you　when　Cort　　〃
〃Yes。〃
〃And　Cuthbert。　Does　it　prey　on　him；　do　you　think？〃
〃I　don't　know。〃　Such　an　avenue　of　parison　did　not　really　interest　him。　He　was　not　concerned　with　how　his　feelings　pared　with　those　of　others。
〃It　preys　on　you　because　you　feel　you've　killed？〃
Roland　shrugged　unwillingly；　all　at　once　not　content　with　this　probing　of　his　motivations。
〃Yet　you　told。　Why？〃
The　boy's　eyes　widened。　〃How　could　I　not？　Treason　was　　〃
His　father　waved　a　hand　curtly。　〃If　you　did　it　for　something　as　cheap　as　a　schoolbook　idea；　you　did　it　unworthily。　I　would　rather　see　all　of　Farson　poisoned。〃
〃I　didn't！〃　The　words　jerked　out　of　him　violently。　〃I　wanted　to　kill　him　　both　of　them！　Liars！　Snakes！　They　〃Go　ahead。〃
〃They　hurt　me；〃　he　finished；　defiant。　〃They　did　something　to　me。　Changed　something。　I　wanted　to　kill　them　for　it。〃
His　father　nodded。　〃That　is　worthy。　Not　moral；　but　it　is　not　your　place　to　be　moral。　In　fact。。。　〃　He　peered　at　his　son。　〃Morals　may　always　be　beyond　you。　You　are　not　quick；　like　Cuthbert　or　Wheeler's　boy。　It　will　make　you　formidable。〃
The　boy；　impatient　before　this；　felt