mc.risingsun-第52章

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　Semiconductor；　even　though　the　pany　was　financially　weak；　far　from　the　best。　But　Cray　couldn't　trust　the　Japanese　anymore。　He　had　to　make　do　with　Fairchild。　So　now　Fairchild　was　making　his　next　generation　of　custom　chips　for　him　…　and　then　he　learned　that　Fairchild　was　going　to　be　sold　to　Fujitsu。　His　big　petitor。　It　was　concern　about　situations　like　that；　and　the　national　security　implications；　that　led　Congress　to　block　the　sale　to　Fujitsu。〃
　〃And　then？〃
　〃Well；　blocking　the　sale　didn't　solve　Fairchild's　financial　problems。　The　pany　was　still　in　trouble。　And　it　eventually　had　to　be　sold。　There　was　a　rumor　it　was　going　to　be　bought　by　Bull；　a　French　pany　that　didn't　pete　in　superputers。　That　sale　might　have　been　permitted　by　Congress。　But　in　the　end；　Fairchild　was　sold　to　an　American　pany。〃
　〃And　MicroCon　is　another　Fairchild？〃
　〃Yes；　in　the　sense　that　MicroCon　will　give　the　Japanese　a　monopoly　on　vital　chip…making　machinery。　Once　they　have　a　monopoly；　they　can　withhold　the　machines　from　American　panies。　But　now　I　think…　〃
　That　was　when　the　phone　rang。　I　left　it　on　the　speakerphone。
　It　was　Lauren。　My　ex…wife。
　
　〃Peter？〃
　I　said；　〃Hello；　Lauren。〃
　〃Peter；　I　am　calling　to　inform　you　that　I'm　going　to　pick　up　Michelle　early　today。〃　Her　voice　sounded　tense；　formal。
　〃You　are？　I　didn't　know　you　were　picking　her　up　at　all。〃
　〃I　never　said　that；　Peter；〃　she　answered　quickly。　〃Of　course　I'm　picking　her　up。〃
　I　said；　〃Okay；　fine。　By　the　way；　who's　Rick？〃
　There　was　a　pause。　〃Really。　That　is　beneath　you；　Peter。〃
　〃Why？〃　I　said。　〃I'm　just　curious。　Michelle　mentioned　it　this　morning。　She　said　he　has　a　black　Mercedes。　Is　he　the　new　boyfriend？〃
　〃Peter。　I　hardly　think　that　is　on　the　same　level。〃
　I　said；　〃The　same　level　as　what？〃
　〃Let's　not　play　games；〃　she　said。　〃This　is　difficult　enough。　I'm　calling　to　tell　you　I　have　to　pick　up　Michelle　early　because　I'm　taking　her　to　the　doctor。〃
　〃Why？　She's　over　her　cold。〃
　〃I'm　taking　her　for　an　examination；　Peter。〃
　〃For　what'？〃
　〃An　examination。〃
　〃I　heard　you；〃　I　said。　〃But…　〃
　〃The　physician　who　will　examine　her　is　Robert　Strauss。　He　is　an　expert；　I'm　told。　I　have　been　asking　people　in　the　office　who　is　the　best　person。　I　don't　know　how　this　is　going　to　turn　out；　Peter；　but　I　want　you　to　know　I　am　concerned；　particularly　in　the　light　of　your　history。〃
　〃Lauren；　what　are　you　talking　about？〃
　〃I'm　talking　about　child　abuse；〃　she　said。　〃I'm　talking　about　sexual　molestation。〃
　〃What？〃
　〃There's　no　getting　around　it；　at　this　point。　You　know　you've　been　accused　of　it　in　the　past。〃
　I　felt　churning　nausea。　Whenever　a　relationship　goes　sour；　there's　always　some　residue　of　resentment；　some　pockets　of　bitterness　and　anger　…　as　well　as　lots　of　private　things　that　you　know　about　the　other　person；　that　you　can　use　against　them。　If　you　choose　to　do　that。　Lauren　never　had。
　〃Lauren；　you　know　that　abuse　charge　was　trumped　up；　You　know　everything　about　that。　We　were　married　at　the　time。〃
　〃I　only　know　what　you　told　me。〃　Her　voice　sounded　distant　now；　moralistic；　a　little　sarcastic。　Her　prosecutor's　voice。
　〃Lauren；　for　Christ's　sake。　This　is　ridiculous。　What's　going　on？〃
　〃It　is　not　ridiculous。　I　have　my　responsibilities　as　a　mother。〃
　〃Well；　for　God's　sake；　you've　never　been　particularly　worried　about　your　responsibilities　as　a　mother　before。　And　now　you…　〃
　〃It's　true　that　I　have　a　demanding　career；〃　she　said；　in　an　icy　tone；　〃but　there　has　never　been　any　question　that　my　daughter　es　first。　And　I　deeply；　deeply　regret　if　my　past　behavior　in　any　way　contributed　to　this　unpleasant　circumstance　now。〃　I　had　the　feeling　that　she　wasn't　talking　to　me。　She　was　rehearsing。　Trying　out　the　words　to　see　how　they　would　sound　before　a　judge。　〃Clearly；　Peter；　if　there　is　child　abuse；　Michelle　cannot　continue　to　live　with　you。　Or　even　to　see　you。〃
　I　felt　pain　in　my　chest。　A　wrenching。
　〃What　are　you　talking　about？　Who　told　you　there　was　child　abuse？〃
　〃Peter；　I　don't　think　it's　appropriate　for　me　to　ment　at　this　point　in　time。〃
　〃Was　it　Wilhelm？　Who　called　you；　Lauren？〃
　〃Peter；　there's　no　point　in　going　into　this；　I'm　officially　notifying　you　that　I'm　going　to　pick　Michelle　up　at　four　p。m。　I　want　her　ready　to　go　at　four　this　afternoon。〃
　〃Lauren…　〃
　〃I　have　my　secretary；　Miss　Wilson；　listening　on　the　line　and　making　stenographic　notes　of　our　conversation。　I'm　giving　you　formal　notice　of　my　intention　to　pick　up　my　daughter　and　take　her　for　a　physical　examination。　Do　you　have　any　questions　about　my　decision？〃
　〃No。〃
　〃Four　o'clock；　then。　Thank　you　for　your　cooperation。　And　let　me　add　on　a　personal　note；　Peter；　I'm　truly　sorry　that　it　has　e　to　this。〃
　And　she　hung　up。
　
　I　had　been　involved　in　sex　abuse　cases　when　I　was　a　detective。　I　knew　how　it　worked。　The　fact　is；　you　usually　can't　determine　anything　from　a　physical　exam。　It's　always　equivocal。　And　if　a　kid　is　questioned　by　a　psychologist　who　hammers　her　with　questions；　the　kid　will　eventually　start　to　go　along；　and　make　up　answers　to　please　the　psychologist。　Normal　procedure　requires　the　psychologist　to　videotape　the　kids；　to　prove　that　the　questioning　wasn't　leading。　But　the　situation　is　almost　always　unclear　when　it　finally　es　before　a　judge。　And　the　judge　must　therefore　rule　conservatively。　Which　means；　if　there　is　a　possibility　of　abuse；　to　keep　the　child　away　from　the　accused　parent。　Or　at　least；　not　allow　unsupervised　visitation。　No　overnight　visits。　Or　perhaps　not　even…　
　〃That's　enough；〃　Connor　said；　sitting　beside　me　in　the　car。　〃e　back　now。〃
　〃Sorry；〃　I　said。　〃But　it's　upsetting。〃
　〃I'm　sure。　Now：　what　haven't　you　told　me？〃
　〃About　what？〃
　〃The　molestation　charge。〃
　〃Nothing。　There's　nothing　to　it。〃
　〃Kōhai；〃　he　said　quietly。　〃I　can't　help　you　if　you　won't　tell　me。〃
　〃It　had　nothing　to　do　with　sexual　molestation；〃　I　said；　〃It　was　something　else　entirely。　It　was　about　money。〃
　Connor　said　nothing。　He　just　waited。　Looking　at　me。
　〃Ah；　hell；〃　I　said。
　And　I　told　him。
　
　You　have　these　times　in　your　life　when　you　believe　you　know　what　you're　doing；　but　you　really　don't。　Later　on；　you　can　look　back；　and　you　see　you　weren't　acting　right　at　all。　You　drifted　into　something；　and　you　were　pletely　screwed　up。　But　at　the　time；　you　thought　everything　was　fine。
　What　happened　to　me　was；　I　was　in　love。　Lauren　was　one　of　those　patrician…acting　girls；　lean　and　graceful　and　understated。　She　looked　like　she　grew　up　with　horses。　And　she　was　younger　than　me；　and　beautiful。
　I　always　knew　it　wouldn't　work　between　us；　but　I　was　trying　to　make　it　work　anyway。　We　had　gotten　married　and　had　begun　living　together　and　she　was　starting　to　be　dissatisfied。　Dissatisfied　with　my　apartment；　where　it　was　located；　how　much　money　we　had。　All　of　that。　She　was　throwing　up；　which　didn't　help。　She　had　crackers　in　the　car；　crackers　by　the　bed；　crackers　everywhere。　She　was　so　miserable　and　so　unhappy　that　I　tried　to　please　her　in　little　ways。　Get　her　things。　Bring　her　things。　Cook　her　meals。　Do　little　domestic　things。　It　wasn't　my　usual　way；　but　I　was　in　love。　I　was　drifting　into　this　habit　of　pleasing　her。　Trying　to　please　her。
　And　there　was　constant　pressure。　More　this；　more　that。　More　money。　More；　more。
　We　also　had　a　specific　problem。　Her　health　insurance　through　the　D。A。's　office　didn't　cover　pregnancy　and　neither　did　mine。　After　we　got　married；　we　couldn't　get　coverage　in　time　to　pay　for　the　baby。　It　was　going　to　cost　eight　thousand　dollars　and　we　had　to　e　up　with　it。　Neither　of　us　had　the　money。　Lauren's　father　was　a　doctor　in　Virginia　but　she　didn't　want　to　ask　him　for　the　money　because　he　disapproved　of　her　marrying　me　in　the　first　place。　My　family　doesn't　have　any　money。　So。　There　wasn't　any　money。　She　worked　for　the　D。A。　I　worked　for　the　department。　She　had　a　lot　of　debts　on　her　MasterCard　and　owed　money　on　her　car。　We　had　to　e　up　with　eight　thousand　dollars。　It's　hanging　over　our　heads。　How　we　are　going　to　do　this。　And　it　gets　to　be　an　unspoken　thing；　at　least　from　her。　That　I　should　handle　it。
　So　one　night　in　August　I'm　out　on　a　domestic　violence　call　in　Ladera　Heights。　Hispanic　couple。　They've　been　drinking　and　going　at　it　pretty　good；　she's　got　a　split　lip　and