emb.seethemdie-第15章
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f a boy。 And now； the same living…room； called a 〃parlor〃 as it was in Puerto Rico； the same colored lights in the ceiling fixture； the same peeling paint； the same long tred through a railroad flat； a man entering a bedroom which could have been the twin of the one he'd slept in as a boy； and a man ing face to face with a boy of sixteen； and seeing in that face pain and trouble； trouble in the eyes and the mouth； and Hernandez the man suddenly wondering where Hernandez the boy had gone。 And wondering what had been lost somewhere along the way。
〃This is Frankie Hernandez；〃 Mrs。 Gomez said。
The boy regarded him without hostility。 But there was determination in his eyes； a stubborn mittment to reveal nothing。 Hernandez had seen this look before。 He had seen it in the squadroom and it had been worn by hardened criminals and by docile housewives； it was the same look； it never varied。 It was a look which plainly stated； 〃You are the Law； and anything I tell you will be held against me。〃
〃Hello； Alfredo；〃 Hernandez said。
〃Hello；〃 the boy answered warily。
〃Your mother's worried about you。〃
〃She hass nothin' to worry abou'。〃
〃Well； she seemed to think so。 Came all the way over to the police station because she thought so。 What about it； Alfredo？〃
Alfredo sighed deeply。 〃I'm goin' to church； Mr Hernandez；〃 he said。 〃I got nothin' to tell you。〃
〃Your mother thinks you've got plenty to tell me。〃
〃My mother doesn't know。 She don' know this neighborhood。〃
〃I know this neighborhood； Alfredo；〃 Hernandez said flatly； and their eyes met； and in the boy's eyes was a recalculation now； a quick estimate of Hemandez's knowledge of the streets； an appraisal of the extent to which he was a neighborhood boy； and the extent to which he was a cop like all the rest。 〃Now what's all this about？〃 Hernandez asked。
Alfredo made his decision in a single moment。 The decision changed nothing。 Hernandez could not help him； Hernandez was the law； there was nothing he could tell him。 〃It ain't abou' nothin'；〃 he said。
〃Your mother said somebody's going to kill you； is that right？〃
Alfredo did not answer。
〃Answer me！〃 Hernandez said； and he seized the boy by the shoulders and forced the contact； forced eyes to meet eyes levelly and honestly。 〃Answer me！〃
Alfredo remained mute； his eyes probing Hemandez's。 And then he nodded。
〃Who？〃 Hernandez asked。
〃The 。。。 the boys；〃 Alfredo answered。 His shoulders ached where Hernandez gripped him。 His eyes remained locked with the detective's。
〃Why？〃
〃No reason；〃 Alfredo said。
〃Is there a girl involved in this？〃
〃Si。〃
Hernandez released his grip tiredly。 This was an old story； and he had heard it many times before。 〃What'd you do to the girl？〃 he asked。
〃Nothin'。〃
〃e on。〃
〃Nothin'。〃
The room went silent again。 Hernandez stared at the boy。 Patiently； he asked； 〃Then why do they want to kill you？〃
〃To show they big shots； thass all；〃 Alfredo said。 〃They tink iss big to kill。〃 He paused。 He was talking more freely now； but he still wondered how far he could trust Hernandez。 In a very low voice； he said； 〃She am' even his girl。 China ain' nobody's girl。〃
〃You must have done something to the girl！〃 Hernandez said angrily。
〃Nothin'！ I swear！ I swear on my mudder's eyes。 Nothin'！ I ony say hello to her。 She a nice girl； smilin' an' everything； she smile at everybody。 So I say hello。 Iss somethin' wrong with dat？ On the islan'； you could say hello to girls； nobody bodder you。 So now I am e here the city； an' now I cann say hello。〃
〃How long have you been in this city？〃 Hernandez asked。
The boy shrugged and turned to his mother。 〃Mama？〃
〃He's a year now；〃 she said。 〃We took the girl over first。 His sister。 Alfredo we left with his grandmother in San Juan。 A year ago； we could afford to bring him here； too。〃
〃Where's the girl now？ Your daughter？〃
〃She 。belongs to the Girl Scouts。 Today； they went on a picnic。 Honeyside Beach； you know that？〃
〃Yes；〃 Hernandez said。 〃You like this city； Alfredo？〃
〃Sure。 I e from La Perla； thass where my gran'mudder lives。 La Perla； thass a big fanguito in San Juan。 A slom； you know？ Shacks。〃
〃I know La Perla。〃
〃It means The Pearl； but thass jus' a joke； you know？ It's not sush a pearl。 Here iss better。 Not so poor； you know？ There； it iss all dirty an' mud； an' iss poor all the time。 Here iss better。〃 He paused。 〃But what can you do here？〃
〃You can do a lot here； Alfredo。〃
〃Yeah？ You go outside the neighborhood； they call you 'spic。' It's my fault I cann speak English so good？ How I'm spose to learn？ There's only one teacher in all my high school who speaks Spanish！〃
〃Others have learned English； Alfredo。〃
〃Sure； I know。 I'm tryin'； ain' I？ I do pretty good； don't I？〃
〃You do fine。〃
〃Still。。。〃
〃Still what？〃
〃Am I 。。。 am I spose to join a gang or somethin'？〃
〃Do you belong to a gang now； Alfredo？〃
〃No； I don' belong no gang。 In Puerto Rico； we don' have this bullshit； these gangs like here。 In Puerto Rico； you can say hello to girls； you can hang aroun' like whoever you want； you know？ An' there's none of these dope。 The kids here take dope。 So I don' wann take dope； an' I don' wann belong to no gang。 I ony wann to go my own way； nobody should bodder me。〃
〃So how'd you get into this mess？〃 Hernandez asked。
〃I say hello！ I swear to God； all I say is hello！ So Zip； he。。。〃 Alfredo cut himself short。
〃Who？〃 Hernandez said quickly。
Alfredo was silent for several seconds。 Then； as if finally mitting himself； he said； 〃Okay。 Zip。 He sees me an' he says I bodderin' his girl。 He says I don' go to church or they wash me。〃
〃You ever been in trouble with this Zip before？〃
〃Once or twice。 Like he try to shake me down at school； you know？ We go the same school。〃
〃What school is that？〃
〃A trade school。 I'm learn a job。〃
〃What kind of job？〃
〃Automotive。 But thass not what I wann to be。〃
〃What do you want to be？〃
〃I wann study radio。 So when I wass in junior high school； I go the adviser； you know？ I say； 'I wann study radio。' She tell me I should be an automotive。 She says iss better for a Spanish kid。 She says iss better opportunity。 But I still wann study radio。〃
〃Why don't you tell this to someone at your school？〃
〃Oh； I don' know。 Who's to listen？ Sometimes I feel 。。。 I don' know。。。 like as if bein' here I'm jus'。。。 not a real human bein'； you know？ Like I feel 。。。 secondhand。〃
Hemandez nodded。 〃What happened with this Zip？ When he tried to shake you down？〃
〃Oh； I give him my lunch money；〃 Alfredo said。 〃It wass ony a quarter。 I dinn want bad blood with him。〃
〃And that was the extent of it？ And you haven't had any trouble with him since that time？〃
〃Never。 Like he's ony new aroun' here； you know？ Maybe he lives here fi'； six months。 He e from somewhere downtown； you know？ So I don' bodder with him； I ony want to go my own way； thass all。 I don' like this 。。。 I mean 。。。 look； they go aroun' stomping people 。。。 they have these street bops 。。。 what I got to fight for？ For what？ I'm here this city now； so here should be better； not worse than Puerto Rico。 So why I got to bodder with kids like Zip？ He thinks to be big is to kill。〃 Alfredo paused and then stared solemnly at Hernandez。 〃To be big is to live； no？〃 he asked。
〃Yes； Alfredo。〃
〃Sure。 But he's leader of the Latin Purples。 So I don' belong no gang； no Royal Guardians； no Spanish Dukes； nothin'。 So who's to protec' me？〃
〃I'm to protect you； Alfredo。〃
〃You？ What can you do？ You tink they afraid of cops？ If I don' show in the street； they call me turkey； they say I afraid of them。 So den everybody laugh at me。 So den how can I walk the street？ If I be turkey； how can I walk the street？〃
〃It's not turkey to want to live； Alfredo。 Every man wants to live。〃
〃I tell you the truth； I'm tired；〃 Alfredo said。 〃I'm tired of walkin' alone。 You walk alone； they all pick on you。 But I'm spose to join a gang？ I'm spose to go aroun' shootin' people？
What for I want to shoot people？〃
〃Don't leave the apartment today； Alfredo；〃 Hernandez said。
〃You'll be safe here。 I'll see to that。〃 〃And tomorrow？〃 Alfredo asked。 〃What about tomorrow？〃 〃We'll see。 Maybe this'll all
