lhamilton.thekillingdance-第28章

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　〃You　two　are　enjoying　this；〃　Richard　said。　It　was　almost　accusatory。
　〃If　we　didn't　enjoy　it；　we'd　both　do　something　else；〃　Edward　said。
　〃Anita　doesn't　kill　people　for　money；　and　you　do。〃
　I　watched　the　humor　drain　from　Edward's　eyes　like　the　sun　sinking　behind　clouds；　leaving　them　pitiless　and　empty。　〃Think　what　you　like；　loverboy；　but　Anita　could　have　chosen　another　line　of　work；　one　that　wouldn't　put　her　in　harm's　way。　But　she　didn't。　There's　a　reason　for　that。〃
　〃She's　not　like　you。〃
　Edward　looked　at　me　with　empty　eyes。　〃Closer　than　she　used　to　be。〃　His　voice　was　soft；　almost　neutral；　but　it　made　me　shiver。
　I　met　his　eyes；　and　for　the　first　time　in　a　long　time；　wondered　what　I'd　given　up　to　be　able　to　pull　the　trigger。　The　same　thing　Edward　had　given　up　inside　himself　to　be　able　to　kill　so　easily？　I　looked　up　at　Richard　and　wondered　if　he　could　do　it。　If；　when　the　fur　flew；　he　could　really　kill　anyone。　Some　people　couldn't。　No　shame　in　that。　But　if　Richard　backed　out；　he　was　dead。　Not　tonight　or　tomorrow；　but　eventually；　because　Marcus　would　see　to　it。　Richard　had　beaten　Marcus　twice　and　refused　the　kill。　I　doubted　Marcus　would　let　him　have　another　shot　at　it。　They'd　taken　Stephen　last　night；　knowing　what　Richard　would　do。　If　I　hadn't　been　with　him；　he　might　he　dead　now。　Shit。
　All　I　had　to　do　was　kill　the　assassin　before　he　or　she　killed　me。　Trust　Richard　not　to　let　Marcus　kill　him。　Keep　Raina　from　killing　me。　And　let's　see；　I　was　sure　there　was　something　else。　Oh；　yeah；　decide　whether　I'm　going　to　sleep　with　Richard；　and　if　I　did；　what　that　would　mean　for　Jean…Claude　and　myself。　There　were　days　when　my　life　was　too　plicated　even　for　me。
　
　
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　Finding　dress…up　clothes　that　you　can　hide　a　gun　in　is　a　bitch。　I　actually　hadn't　planned　to　carry　a　gun　on　my　date　with　Jean…Claude。　Of　course；　that　was　before　the　assassin。　Now　I　wasn't　going　out　without　one。　If　I'd　known　I'd　be　needing　a　gun　tonight；　I'd　have　worn　the　little　black　dress　yesterday　and　saved　the　pants　suit。　But　who　knew；　and　now　all　I'd　packed　besides　jeans　was　the　dress。　It　was　a　little　black　dress　with　just　enough　strap　to　allow　a　bra；　if　you　were　careful。　I'd　bought　a　black　bra　to　be　safe。　Flashing　a　white　bra　strap　in　a　black　dress　always　looked　so　tacky。　The　jacket　was　a　deep　black　velvet；　a　bolero　cut　that　hit　me　at　the　waist。　Black　beading　edged　the　collar　and　hem。
　The　jacket　was　hanging　on　the　doorknob　of　Richard's　closet。　He　was　sitting　forlornly　on　the　bed；　watching　me　put　the　last　touches　on　my　lipstick。　I　was　leaning　forward；　peering　at　myself　in　the　mirror　on　his　dresser。　The　skirt　was　short　enough　that　I　decided　to　wear　a　black　teddy　under　it；　not　for　underwear　but　to　go　over　my　panty　hose；　so　everything　matched。　Ronnie　hadn't　trusted　me　not　to　bend　over　at　least　once　tonight。　She　was　right。　So　even　if　I　forgot；　the　teddy　covered　more　than　most　bathing　suits。　I'd　have　never　picked　out　something　so　short　on　my　own。　Ronnie　was　a　bad　influence　on　me。　If　she'd　known　I　was　planning　to　wear　it　for　Jean…Claude；　she'd　have　probably　chosen　something　else。　She　called　him　fangface。　Or　worse。　She　liked　Richard。
　〃Nice　dress；〃　Richard　said。
　〃Thanks。〃　I　turned　in　front　of　the　mirror　to　check　the　way　the　skirt　hung。　It　was　just　full　enough　to　swing　when　I　moved。　The　black　knife　sheaths　on　my　forearms　actually　matched　the　dress。　The　knives　made　a　nice　touch　of　silver。　The　wrist　sheaths　almost　covered　the　scars　on　my　arms。　Only　the　mound　of　scar　tissue　at　my　left　elbow　was　visible。　A　vampire　had　torn　up　my　arm　once　upon　a　time。　The　same　vamp　had　bitten　through　my　collarbone。　The　scars　were　normal　for　me；　but　every　once　in　a　while　I'd　be　out　enjoying　myself　and　catch　someone　looking；　staring。　They'd　look　hurriedly　away；　or　meet　my　eyes。　It　wasn't　that　the　scars　were　awful　to　look　at。　They　weren't　that　bad…really。　But　they　told　a　story　of　pain　and　something　out　of　the　ordinary。　They　said　I'd　been　places　that　most　people　hadn't；　and　I'd　survived。　Worth　a　stare　or　two；　I　guess。
　The　black　straps　that　held　the　new　knife　down　along　my　spine　showed　a　little　at　the　shoulders；　but　more　across　the　back。　The　hilt　was　hidden　under　my　hair；　but　I　wouldn't　be　taking　the　jacket　off。
　〃Why　didn't　you　wear　this　last　night？〃　Richard　asked。
　〃The　pants　suit　seemed　more　appropriate。〃
　He　stared　at　me；　eyes　roving　over　my　body　more　than　my　face。　He　shook　his　head。　〃For　seeing　someone　you're　not　going　to　sleep　with；　that　is　a　very　sexy　outfit。〃
　I　had　never　planned　on　Richard　seeing　the　dress；　at　least　not　on　the　night　I　wore　it　for　Jean…Claude。　I　wasn't　sure　what　to　say；　but　I'd　try。　〃I　trust　myself　with　Jean…Claude　more　than　I　trust　myself　with　you；　so　he　gets　the　short　skirt　and　you　don't。〃　That　was　the　truth。
　〃You're　saying　I　don't　get　the　sexy　outfit　because　I'm　so　irresistible？〃
　〃Something　like　that。〃
　〃If　I　ran　my　hands　up　your　legs；　would　I　find　panty　hose　or　garters？〃　He　looked　so　solemn；　hurt。　With　everything　else　going　down；　I　shouldn't　have　had　to　worry　about　my　boyfriend's　hurt　feelings；　but　there　it　was。　Life　goes　on；　even　if　you're　ass　deep　in　alligators。
　〃Panty　hose；〃　I　said。
　〃Will　Jean…Claude　find　out　what　kind　of　hose　you're　wearing？〃
　〃He　could　ask；　like　you　did；〃　I　said。
　〃You　know　that's　not　what　I　meant；〃　he　said。
　I　sighed。　〃I　don't　know　how　to　make　this　easier　on　you；　Richard。　If　there's　anything　that　would　make　you　feel　more　secure　about　this；　ask。〃
　To　his　credit；　he　didn't　ask　me　not　to　go。　I　think　he　knew　he　wouldn't　like　the　answer。　〃e　here；〃　he　said　and　held　out　his　hand　to　me。
　I　walked　over　to　him　and　took　his　outstretched　hand。　He　sat　me　on　his　lap；　legs　sideways　like　you'd　sit　on　Santa。　He　encircled　me　with　one　arm；　then　laid　his　other　hand　on　my　thigh。　〃Promise　me　you　won't　sleep　with　him　tonight。〃
　〃With　assassins　ready　to　jump　out　of　the　woodwork；　I　think　that's　a　safe　bet；〃　I　said。
　〃Don't　joke；　Anita；　please。〃
　I　smoothed　my　hand　through　his　hair。　He　looked　so　serious；　so　hurt。　〃I've　said　no　for　a　very　long　time；　Richard。　Why　should　you　be　worried　about　tonight？〃
　〃The　dress；〃　he　said。
　〃I　admit　it's　short；　but　。　。　。〃
　He　smoothed　his　hand　up　my　thigh　until　it　vanished　under　the　skirt。　He　rested　his　hand　just　below　the　lace　of　the　teddy。　〃You're　wearing　lingerie；　for　Gods　sake；　you　never　wear　lingerie。〃
　I　would　have　explained　about　everything　matching；　but　somehow　I　didn't　think　that　would　be　forting。　〃Okay；　I　won't　sleep　with　him　tonight。　I　hadn't　planned　on　it　to　begin　with。〃
　〃Promise　me　you'll　e　back　and　sleep　with　me。〃　He　smiled　when　he　said　it。
　I　smiled　back　and　slid　off　his　lap。　〃You'd　have　to　shift　first。　I'd　have　to　see　your　beast。　Or　so　you　keep　telling　me。〃
　〃I　could　shift　when　you　get　back。〃
　〃Could　you　take　human　form　again　quickly　enough　to　do　us　any　good　tonight？〃
　He　smiled。　〃I'm　strong　enough　to　be　Ulfric；　Anita。　One　of　the　things　I　can　do　is　change　form　almost　at　will。　I　don't　pass　out　when　I　change　back　to　human　form　like　most　shapeshifters。〃
　〃Handy；〃　I　said。
　He　smiled。　〃e　back　tonight；　and　I'll　change　for　you。　Sylvie's　right。　I　have　to　accept　what　I　am。〃
　〃Part　of　that　is　trying　it　out　on　me；　huh？〃
　He　nodded。　〃I　think　so。〃
　Staring　into　his　solemn　eyes；　I　knew　that　if　he　changed　for　me　tonight　and　I　couldn't　deal　with　it；　it　would　destroy　something　inside　of　him。　I　hoped　I　was　up　to　it。　〃When　I　e　back　tonight；　I'll　watch　you　shift。〃
　He　looked　grim　as　if　he　expected　that　I'd　run　screaming。　〃Kiss　me；　and　get　out　of　here；〃　he　said。
　I　kissed　him；　and　he　licked　his　lips。　〃Lipstick。〃　He　kissed　me　again。　〃But　underneath　I　can　still　taste　you。〃
　〃Hmmm；〃　I　said。　I　stared　down　at　him　and　almost　didn't　want　to　go。　Almost。　The　doorbell　rang；　and　I　jumped。　Richard　didn't；　as　if　he'd　heard　it　before　I　had。
　〃Be　careful。　I　wish　I　could　be　with　you。〃
　〃There'll　be　media　all　over　the　place；〃　I　said。　〃Wouldn't　do　to　get　your　picture　taken　with　a　bunch　of　monsters。　It　might　blow　your　cover。〃
　〃I'd　blow　my　cover　if　it　would　keep　you　safe。〃
　He　loved　teaching；　yet　I　believed　him。　He'd　e　out　of　the　closet　for　me。　〃Thanks；　but　Edward's　right。　I'd　be　so　worried　about　keeping　you　alive；　I　wouldn't　be　taking　good　care　of　myself。〃
　〃Yo