lhamilton.thekillingdance-第20章

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　I　walked　closer　until　I　could　have　reached　out　and　touched　him。　His　otherworldly　energy　whirled　over　me　until　it　was　hard　to　draw　a　good　breath。　〃We　need　to　talk；　Richard。〃
　〃I　don't　have　time　for　this　right　now；　Anita。〃
　〃Make　time；〃　I　said。
　He　glared　down　at　me。　〃Talk　to　me　while　Lillian　finishes　up。　I've　got　people　ing　over　for　a　meeting　in　about　fifteen　minutes。〃
　〃What　meeting？〃　I　asked。
　〃To　discuss　the　Marcus　situation；〃　Sylvie　said。　〃He　scheduled　the　meeting　before　last　night's　adventure。〃
　Richard　stared　at　her；　and　it　wasn't　a　friendly　look。　〃If　I'd　wanted　her　to　know　about　the　meeting；　I'd　have　told　her。〃
　〃What　else　haven't　you　told　me　Richard？〃
　He　turned　those　angry　eyes　to　me。　〃What　haven't　you　told　me？〃
　I　blinked　at　him；　genuinely　puzzled。　〃I　don't　know　what　you're　talking　about。〃
　〃A　shotgun　fires　over　your　head　twice　and　you　don't　know　what　I'm　talking　about。〃
　Oh　that。　〃I　did　the　right　thing；　Richard。〃
　〃You're　always　right；　aren't　you？〃
　I　looked　at　the　floor　and　shook　my　head。　When　I　looked　back　at　him；　he　was　still　angry；　but　I　was　losing　my　anger。　A　first。　This　was　going　to　be　the　fight。　The　one　that　ended　it。　I　wasn't　wrong。　No　amount　of　talking　would　change　that。　But　if　we　were　going　to　break　up；　we'd　go　down　in　flames。　〃Let's　finish　this；　Richard。　You　wanted　to　go　into　the　bedroom。〃
　He　stood　up；　body　stiff　with　an　anger　that　was　deeper　than　I　could　prehend。　It　was　controlled　rage；　and　I　didn't　understand　where　it　was　ing　from。　It　was　a　bad　sign。　〃You　sure　you　can　stand　to　see　me　naked？〃　His　voice　was　utterly　bitter；　and　I　didn't　know　why。
　〃What's　wrong；　Richard？　What　did　I　do？〃
　He　shook　his　head　too　vigorously；　making　him　wince　as　his　shoulder　caught　the　movement。　〃Nothing；　nothing。〃　He　walked　out　of　the　room。　Lillian　looked　at　me；　but　followed　him。　I　sighed　and　joined　them。　I　wasn't　looking　forward　to　the　next　few　minutes；　but　I　wasn't　going　to　chicken　out。　We'd　say　all　the　ugly　things　and　make　it　as　nasty　as　possible。　Trouble　was；　I　didn't　have　any　nasty　things　to　say。　It　made　the　fight　a　lot　less　fun　for　me。
　Jason　whispered　as　I　walked　by；　very　softly；　〃Go；　Anita；　go；　Anita。〃
　It　made　me　smile。
　Sylvie　watched　me　with　cool　eyes。　〃Good　luck。〃　It　didn't　sound　pletely　sincere。
　〃Do　you　have　a　problem？〃　I'd　have　much　rather　fought　with　her　than　Richard。
　〃If　he　wasn't　dating　you；　then　he　might　choose　a　mate。　It　would　help　things。〃
　〃You　want　the　job？〃　I　asked。
　〃Yes；〃　she　said；　〃I　do；　but　sex　is　integral　and　I'm　not　up　for　it。〃
　〃Then　I'm　not　standing　in　your　way；〃　I　said。
　〃Not　in　mine；　no；〃　she　said。　Which　implied　there　were　others；　but　I　didn't　give　a　shit；　not　today。　I　said；　〃It　is　too　damn　early　in　the　morning　for　furball　politics。　If　someone　wants　a　piece　of　me；　tell　them　to　go　to　the　back　of　the　line。〃
　She　cocked　her　head　to　one　side；　like　a　curious　dog。　〃Is　it　a　long　line？〃
　〃Lately；　yeah。〃
　〃I　thought　all　your　enemies　were　dead；〃　Jason　said。
　〃I　keep　making　new　ones；〃　I　said。
　He　smiled。　〃Fancy　that。〃
　I　shook　my　head　and　walked　towards　the　bedroom。　I'd　have　rather　faced　Raina　again　than　Richard。　I　almost　hoped　the　assassin　would　jump　out　of　the　woodwork　and　give　me　something　to　shoot　at。　It　would　hurt　less　than　breaking　up　with　Richard。
　
　
　10
　
　Richard's　bedroom　was　painted　pale　green；　a　vibrant　rug　thrown　in　front　of　the　bed　like　a　piece　of　stained　glass。　The　bed　was　a　heavy　four…poster；　and　even　hurt；　he'd　made　the　bed；　pulling　the　solid　red　spread　up　over　it。　He　had　three　solid　spreads　that　he　rotated　on　the　bed；　green；　blue；　and　red。　Each　color　picked　up　a　different　color　in　the　rug　and　the　painting　over　the　bed。　The　painting　was　of　wolves　in　a　winter　scene。　The　wolves　were　looking　directly　out　of　the　picture　as　if　you'd　just　e　around　a　tree　and　surprised　them。　There　was　a　deer　bleeding　on　the　snow；　its　throat　torn　out。　It　was　an　odd　choice　for　a　bedroom；　but　it　fit　somehow。　Besides；　I　liked　it。　It　had　that　quality　that　all　fine　paintings　do；　as　if　when　you　leave　the　room　the　painting　will　move；　life　suspended　and　captured　on　canvas。　The　green　spread　emphasized　the　evergreens；　the　blue　spread　caught　the　washed　blue　of　the　sky　and　the　bluish　shadows；　the　red　caught　the　stain　of　blood　on　the　snow。
　Richard　lay　on　his　stomach　across　the　crimson　cloth。　He　was　totally　nude；　his　jeans　thrown　on　the　corner　of　the　bed。　His　tanned　skin　looked　dark　and　smooth　and　incredibly　touchable　against　the　red　cloth。　I　felt　heat　rise　up　my　face　as　my　eyes　followed　the　curve　of　his　body；　over　the　smooth　expanse　of　his　buttocks。　Lillian　had　just　finished　sewing　up　a　curve　of　claw　that　had　spilled　down　from　his　buttocks。　I　looked　away。
　I'd　seen　Richard　nude　once　when　I　first　met　him；　but　never　since。　We　hadn't　even　been　thinking　about　dating　then。　I　had　to　look　away；　mainly　because　I　wanted　to　look。　I　wanted　to　see　him　like　that；　and　it　was　too　embarrassing　for　words。　I　studied　the　contents　of　the　built…in　shelves　on　his　bedroom　wall　like　I'd　memorize　them。　Bits　of　quartz；　a　small　bird's　nest。　There　was　a　lump　of　fossilized　coral　as　big　as　my　hand；　a　dark　rich　gold　in　color　with　streaks　of　white　quartz。　I'd　found　it　on　a　camping　trip　and　given　it　to　him　because　he　collected　bits　and　pieces；　and　I　didn't。　I　touched　the　bit　of　coral；　and　didn't　want　to　turn　around。
　〃You　said　you　wanted　to　talk；　then　talk；〃　Richard　said。
　I　glanced　back。　Lillian　snipped　the　black　thread　she　was　using　to　close　his　skin。　〃There；〃　she　said。　〃You　shouldn't　even　have　a　scar。〃
　Richard　folded　his　arms　on　the　bed；　resting　his　chin　on　his　forearms。　His　hair　spread　around　his　face；　foaming　and　touchable。　I　knew　it　was　as　soft　as　it　looked。
　Lillian　glanced　from　one　to　the　other　of　us。　〃I　believe　I'll　leave　you　two　alone。〃　She　began　putting　things　into　her　bag；　which　was　brown　leather　and　looked　more　like　a　fishing　tackle　box　than　anything　else。　She　looked　at　Richard　and　back　to　me。　〃Take　a　piece　of　advice　from　an　old　lady。　Don't　screw　up。〃
　She　left　with　Richard　and　me　both　staring　after　her。
　〃You　can　get　dressed　now；〃　I　said。
　He　glanced　at　his　crumpled　jeans；　moving　only　his　dark　eyes。　His　eyes　came　back　to　me；　and　they　were　as　angry　as　I'd　ever　seen　them。　〃Why〃
　I　concentrated　on　meeting　those　angry　eyes　and　tried　not　to　stare　at　his　body。　It　was　harder　than　I　would　have　admitted　out　loud。　〃Because　its　hard　to　fight　with　you　when　you're　naked。〃
　He　raised　up　on　his　elbows；　hair　falling　down　into　his　eyes；　until　he　stared　at　me　through　a　curtain　of　brown　gold　hair。　It　reminded　me　of　Gabriel；　and　that　was　unnerving　as　hell。
　〃I　know　you　want　me；　Anita。　I　can　smell　it。〃
　Oh；　that　made　me　feel　better。　I　blushed　for　the　second　time　in　five　minutes。　〃So；　you're　gorgeous。　So　what？　What　the　hell　does　that　have　to　do　with　anything〃
　He　raised　up　on　all　fours；　knees；　and　hands。　I　looked　away　so　fast　it　made　me　dizzy。　〃Please　put　on　your　jeans。〃
　I　heard　him　slide　off　the　bed。　〃You　can't　even　look　at　me；　can　you？〃
　There　was　something　about　the　way　he　said　it　that　made　me　want　to　see　his　face；　but　I　couldn't　turn　around。　I　just　couldn't。　If　this　was　the　last　fight　we　ever　had；　I　didn't　want　the　memory　of　his　body　imprinted　on　my　mind。　It　would　be　too　cruel。
　I　felt　him　standing　behind　me。　〃What　do　you　want　from　me；　Richard？〃
　〃Look　at　me。〃
　I　shook　my　head。
　He　touched　my　shoulder；　and　I　jerked　away。
　〃You　can't　even　stand　for　me　to　touch　you；　can　you？〃　For　the　first　time。　I　heard　pain　in　his　voice；　raw　and　hurting。
　I　turned　then。　I　had　to　see　his　face。　His　eyes　glittered　with　unshed　tears；　eyes　wide　so　they　wouldn't　fall。　He'd　pushed　his　hair　back　from　his　face；　but　it　was　already　spilling　forward。　My　eyes　traveled　down　his　muscular　chest；　and　I　wanted　to　run　my　hands　over　his　nipples；　down　his　slender　waist；　and　lower。　I　drew　my　eyes　back　up　to　his　face　with　force　of　will　alone；　my　face　pale　now；　rather　than　blushing。　I　was　having　trouble　breathing。　My　heart　was　beating　so　hard；　it　was　hard　to　hear。
　〃I　love　it　when　you　touch　me；〃　I　said。
　He　stared　down　at　me；　his　eyes　filled　with　pain。　I　think　I　preferred　the　anger。　〃I　used　to　admire　you　for　saying　no　to　Jean…Claude。　I　know　you　want　him；　and　you　keep　refusing。　I　though