rh.theassassinsapprentice-第19章
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e we'll have together。 So。 I'm Chade； and I'm yet another teacher that Shrewd has found for you。 It took him a while to remember I was here； and then it took him a space to nerve himself to ask me。 And it took me even longer to agree to teach you。 But all that's done now。 As to what I'm to teach you 。。。 well。〃
He rose and moved to the fire。 He cocked his head as he stared into it； then stooped to take a poker and stir the embers to fresh flames。 〃It's murder； more or less。 Killing people。 The fine art of diplomatic assassination。 Or blinding； or deafening。 Or a weakening of the limbs； or a paralysis or a debilitating cough or impotency。 Or early senility； or insanity or 。。。 but it doesn't matter。 It's all been my trade。 And it will be yours； if you agree。 Just know； from the beginning； that I'm going to be teaching you how to kill people。 For your king。 Not in the showy way Hod is teaching you； not on the battlefield where others see and cheer you on。 No。 I'll be teaching you the nasty； furtive； polite ways to kill people。 You'll either develop a taste for it； or not。 That isn't something I'm in charge of。 But I'll make sure you know how。 And I'll make sure of one other thing； for that was the stipulation I made with King Shrewd。 That you know what you are learning； as I never did when I was your age。 So。 I'm to teach you to be an assassin。 Is that all right with you； boy？〃
I nodded again； uncertain； but not knowing what else to do。
He peered at me。 〃You can speak； can't you？ You're not a mute as well as a bastard； are you？〃
I swallowed。 〃No； sir。 I can speak。〃
〃Well； then； do speak。 Don't just nod。 Tell me what you think of all this。 Of who I am and what I just proposed that we do。〃
Invited to speak； I yet stood dumb。 I stared at the poxed face； the papery skin of his hands； and felt the gleam of his green eyes on me。 I moved my tongue inside my mouth； but found only silence。 His manner invited words； but his visage was still more terrifying than anything I had ever imagined。
〃Boy；〃 he said； and the gentleness in his voice startled me into meeting his eyes。 〃I can teach you even if you hate me； or if you despise the lessons。 I can teach you if you are bored； or lazy or stupid。 But I can't teach you if you're afraid to speak to me。 At least； not the way I want to teach you。 And I can't teach you if you decide this is something you'd rather not learn。 But you have to tell me。 You've learned to guard your thoughts so well； you're almost afraid to let yourself know what they are。 But try speaking them aloud； now； to me。 You won't be punished。〃
〃I don't much like it；〃 I suddenly blurted。 〃The idea of killing people。〃
〃Ah。〃 He paused。 〃Neither did I； when it came down to it。 Nor do I； still。〃 He sighed suddenly； deeply。 〃As each time es； you'll decide。 The first time will be hardest。 But know； for now； that that decision is many years away。 And in the meantime； you have much to learn。〃 He hesitated。 〃'There is this； boy。 And you should remember it in every situation； not just this one。 Learning is never wrong。 Even learning how to kill isn't wrong。 Or right。 It's just a thing to learn； a thing I can teach you。 That's all。 For now； do you think you could learn how to do it； and later decide if you want to do it？〃
Such a question to put to a boy。 Even then； something in me raised its hackles and sniffed at the idea； but boy that I was； I could find no objection to raise。 And curiosity was nibbling at me。
〃I can learn it。〃
〃Good。〃 He smiled； but there was a tiredness to his face and he didn't seem as pleased as he might have。 〃That's well enough； then。 Well enough。〃 He looked around the room。 〃We may as well begin tonight。 Let's start by tidying up。 There's a broom over there。 Oh； but first； change out of your nightshirt into something 。。。 ah； there's a ragged old robe over there。 That'll do for now。 Can't have the washer folk wondering why your nightshirts smell of camphor and pain's ease； can we？ Now； you sweep up the floor a bit while I put away a few things。〃
And so passed the next few hours。 I swept； then mopped the stone floor。 He directed me as I cleared the paraphernalia from the great table。 I turned the herbs on their drying rack。 I fed the three lizards he had caged in the corner； chopping up some sticky old meat into chunks that they gulped whole。 I wiped clean a number of pots and bowls and stored them。 And he worked alongside me； seeming grateful for the pany； and chatted to me as if we were both old men。 Or both young boys。
〃No letters as yet？ No ciphering。 Bagrash！ What's the old man thinking？ Well； I shall see that remedied swiftly。 You've your father's brow； boy； and just his way of wrinkling it。 Has anyone ever told you that before？ Ah； there you are； Slink； you rascal！ What mischief have you been up to now？〃
A brown weasel appeared from behind a tapestry； and we were introduced to one another。 Chade let me feed Slink quail eggs from a bowl on the table； and laughed when the little beast followed me about begging for more。 He gave me a copper bracelet that I found under the table； warning that it might make my wrist green； and cautioning that if anyone asked me about it； I should say I had found it behind the stables。
At some time we stopped for honey cakes and hot spiced wine。 We sat together at a low table on some rugs before the fireplace； and I watched the firelight dancing over his scarred face and wondered why it had seemed so frightening。 He noticed me watching him； and his face contorted in a smile。 〃Seems familiar； doesn't it； boy？ My face； I mean。〃
It didn't。 I had been staring at the grotesque scars on the pasty white skin。 I had no idea what he meant。 I stared at him questioningly； trying to figure it out。
〃Don't trouble yourself about it； boy。 It leaves its tracks on all of us； and sooner or later you'll get the tumble of it。 But now； well 。。。〃 He rose； stretching； so that his cassock bared his skinny white calves。 〃Now it's mostly later。 Or earlier； depending on which end of the day you fancy most。 Time you headed back to your bed。 Now。 You'll remember that this is all a very dark secret； won't you？ Not just me and this room； but the whole thing； waking up at night and lessons in how to kill people； and all of it。〃
〃I'll remember；〃 I told him； and then； sensing that it would mean something to him； I added； 〃You have my word。〃
He chuckled； and then nodded almost sadly。 I changed back into my night robe； and he saw me down the steps。 He held his glowing light by my bed as I clambered in； and then smoothed the blankets over me as no one had done since I'd left Burrich's chambers。 I think I was asleep before he had even departed from my bedside。
Brant was sent to wake me the next morning； so late was I in arising。 I came awake groggy； my head pounding painfully。 But as soon as he left； I sprang from my bed and raced to the corner of my room。 Cold stone met my hands as I pushed against the wall there； and no crack in mortar or stone gave any sign of the secret door I felt sure must be there。 Never for one instant did I think Chade had been a dream； and even if I had； there remained the simple copper bracelet on my wrist to prove he wasn't。
I dressed hurriedly and passed through the kitchens for a slab of bread and cheese that I was still eating when I got to the stables。 Burrich was out of sorts with my tardiness and found fault with every aspect of my horsemanship and stable tasks。 I remember well how he berated me。 〃Don't think that because you've a room up in the castle and a crest on your jerkin that you can turn into some sprawl about rogue who snores in his bed until all hours and then only rises to fluff at his hair。 I'll not have it。 Bastard you may be； but you're Chivalry's bastard； and I'll make you a man he'll be proud of。〃
I paused； the grooming brushes still in my hands。 〃You mean Regal； don't you？〃
My unwonted question startled him。 〃What？〃
〃When you talk about rogues who stay in bed all morning and do nothing except fuss about hair and garments； you mean how Regal is。〃
Burrich opened his mouth an
